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(15 posts)

Started 1 year ago by specialk_sunnylee
Latest reply from jacquirsw1

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specialk_sunnylee
Member

well i had to start a new one cuz the first one won't update anymore
im procrasting to write my research paper right now cuz school starts tomorrow..
its only 10pm yet but im way behind. so... yea.
yay for all nighter lol!

anyways... i've been real good past two days.
started a new week pretty good as well.
i didnt get to weight last week so i kinda did in the mid of the week which i was at 140lbs- on thursday, to be exact.
so then i weighed this morning and i was 136lb.
i was happy but scared at the same time
cuz i've been feeling fatter recently and i was afraid i'd gained some
but my weight dropped down 4lbs in 3-4days.
THAT IS SCARY.
one thing is that i binged on friday and my tummy didnt settle down the day after
so i was kinda having diarrhea yesterday... so the water that i lost prob included in that 4lbs...
that makes me more conscious about weight and its bothering me;

well i came to cool down my brain and i need to go back to write.
i might come several times tonight-morning while im up
if i get urges to eat.
or to cool down my brain , again.

Sunny<3

Posted 1 year ago #
specialk_sunnylee
Member

i survived another all nighter !!
yikes.
procrastination.
im so bad.
well i just came home from school
was gonna sleep but need to have a snack so i wont get up and binge
so im just gonna clean up my room real quick and let the plum and strawberries settle down a little bit in my stomach
and NAP!!!

Sunny <<33

Posted 1 year ago #
jacquirsw1
Member

Well done hon you have done really well. I hope that the snack did the trick

Jacqui

Posted 1 year ago #
ivierose
Member

Awesome job! I feel ya on the procrastination! Hope that snack helped and the paper is coming along ok

Posted 1 year ago #
specialk_sunnylee
Member

oh god
i think im gonna get a failing grade on my paper
cuz it was a page short and... yea..
it'll prob bother me when i get it
but im gonna try to forget about it since i cant really do anything about it

well today was good :]
oh btw, i went to bed at 7pm with my alarm at 9, and never got up til 7 in the morning... lol
anyways...
i just had a pretty big meal with my host family's other family members and stuff..
but i didnt overeat or anything which is awesome.
it was a pretty big meal but i dont really feel that much full.. lol
one thing is that im alone right now and there's also something calling me when im alone.
but i'll be ok cuz i've got lots of things to work on!

my snack will be around... 10? ish..

oh and im supposed to get my driver's license tomorrow XD
i dont have a car or anything but ..just something new!
yah !

Sunny <<33

Posted 1 year ago #
jacquirsw1
Member

You are doing really well I am really impressed with how you are developing before our eyes. A few weeks ago you would have been totally off the rails at this point and in the cycle of a major binge episode but you are not, you are learning to put things into there boxes and accept them.

You will probably find that your assignment isn't as bad as you think it will be.

Jacqui

Posted 1 year ago #
specialk_sunnylee
Member

so.
i binged last night..
which affected me really badly today especially school wise.
because i binged, i wasted so much time
i didnt realize what school works i had until late at night
so i was up til 3 in the morning.
AND my stomach has been super, super bloated all day.
i didnt have a bad day but i just felt crappy.
the reason, i think, is becuase i ate a meal instead of snack at 5:30
i was gonna eat a snack earlier but i didnt so i decided to eat a meal
and maybe i'd eat less that way.
nope. didnt work. of course.
i started eating, never stopped for a couple hours.

i had to skip late night snack and morning snack cuz my stomach was just SO, SO bloated.
i felt So sick.
i didnt skipp breakfast though.

so i definitely need to improve my monitoring
cuz i was having a strange day in first had
and i actually knew this was gonna happen earlier in the morning.
for these kinda days, i need to be more aware and need to be ready to persist that urge.

however, i have had 3 good days this week and 1 binge.
so that's a pro.
and ive been good at limiting my meals and snacks at planned times.

last thing.
all i wish right now is that that binge i had last night is not gonna turn to series.

i should probably be back later after having dinner.
so, ttyl!

Sunny <<33

Posted 1 year ago #
jacquirsw1
Member

You have done really well.

Last night binge does not have to turn into a series of binges at all, you have put it into context you know the reasons for it so you need to try and accept it and move on from it. You have lots of positives to focus on, you have been doing well with the planned eating, and to make sure you still had breakfast today even if you did not have your snacks is also a major breakthrough as I bet in the past you would have not had anything and that is what would have set you up to go into a cycle so you have already made positive changes to stop it becoming a series of binges.

Well done for all the things you have developed

Jacqui

Posted 1 year ago #
ivierose
Member

Wow, 3 good days and only 1 binge! That's awesome!! Hey, it's alright that you binged, you need to look at the positives of the week! 3 GOOD DAYS!!!! WOOOO!!! And like Jacqui said before, you need to look at the big picture ... you're doing amazing compared to how you used to be!!! You have made some great progress and I hope you try to focus on that instead Your progress is quite motivating!

Ps. I think you're being too hard about your assignment too! I think you'll find you didn't do as bad as you think! One page short isn't gonna fail you!

Posted 1 year ago #
specialk_sunnylee
Member

oh my lord
during last week, i just thought that i was gonna need to stay in step2 for a while so i wasnt trying so hard or whatever
but it turned out that i am indeed ready for step 3
i mean, i didnt think i was , but my diary tells me so... lol...
so from yesterday, i have entered step3
and i havent binged for a week (ive had urges , of course)

spring break week was terrible and i had the worst week ever as in the program
but last week turned out really good even tho it was a full of work week
so im real happy.

so yeah
last week was ridiculously CRAZY, right after spring break
becuase i was terrible during spring break , had the worst week , got nothing done.
plus lots of competition stuff going on...

and i've been tempted stop come here cuz i was "busy"
but i remember what happened last time when i didnt come for a while
so here i am

anyways
still, i've got tons of stuff to do
so i'll be back!
ttyl everyone

Sunny <<33

Posted 1 year ago #
ivierose
Member

Great work hun! Glad you made it to the next step! You're doing awesome

Posted 1 year ago #
jacquirsw1
Member

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

and the thing I am impressed about the most is that you have realised the thought of not coming here for the support as you have been doing so well and have been able to put that aside and think about what is actually right for you

Jacqui

Posted 1 year ago #
V
Member

Great job Sunny! Congrats on moving to step 3 and not binging for a whole week! That's really amazing.

-V

Posted 1 year ago #
specialk_sunnylee
Member

oh gosh
i havent been on here for such a long time.
well, its end of the year , school's about to end soon
and it is just ridiculously crazy.
along with prom coming up in about 10days or so.

i have been doing ok.
actually not really , considering step 3.
i have had urges and binges
but i havent been able to use the alternative activities.
it is quite difficult... i realized.
this is 2nd week of step3 but not much progress on step3.
school is just .... UGH!

well, hopefully, i'll start doing it right soon.

gotta go now...:(
i hope everyone else is doing good!

Sunny<<333

Posted 1 year ago #
jacquirsw1
Member

Hi Hon

you are doing ok, you have got a lot of things going on at the moment and are still keeping on with the programme which is great, it doesn't matter whether you have to stay on this bit for a while especially with everything else in your life.

You haven't got long of school now so make the most of it.

Jacqui

Posted 1 year ago #

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