Tips to stop overeating, stop emotional eating, stop eating fast food, stop eating junk food
one day at a time
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December 7, 2010 at 1:17 pm #2941
Hi… I’ve been reading through a lot of your journals and I definitely can relate to most/all of what I’ve read – eating in secret, feeling totally controlled by food, constantly worrying about losing weight (and then bingeing because I feel so guilty about the way I look). I am SO TIRED of myself. I just feel like I don’t even know who I’ve turned into. This seems like a good place to go to for support. It also helps to read the journals of women who have beat this and have a healthy, normal relationship with food. That’s all I want now. I’m going to try not to focus so much on losing weight, and first just try to eat what I want, when I want it, and then STOP when I am full.
Part of me still thinks, why can’t you just be normal??? I recently had a baby, a beautiful little boy who I am totally in love with. Other than this crazy urge to eat everything in my life is pretty good. I feel like if I could just get on top of my eating habits, I could feel like a normal person again. I so want to get back there. My son deserves a better, healthier mom. But it’s so hard (uughhhh I hate whining!) when the Binge Monster hits (I stole that name from someone else’s journal – but it’s the perfect name! so true!!). So far it’s 7:15 a.m. and it has yet to rear its ugly head… but I feel scared to see what the rest of the day holds. I never know if it will be a good day or a bad one – and it’s so frightening to feel out of control, especially when it’s FOOD, which should be one of the few things I can control.
I’m sorry this is long and so negative. Thanks for sharing all of your stories… it really does help to know that I am not the only one, and that it is possible to overcome BED. So here I go, starting day one.December 7, 2010 at 7:18 pm #72620
Hi M! I am pretty new to this site as well. It really is great support and it has helped me so much! I haven’t binged at all, not once!, since I started posting on here. Just knowing there are people having the same struggles and talking to them helps so much.
I know exactly how it is to feel out of control with food and to just be tired of yourself. Just staying positive and busy is what has really helped me! And congratulations on your new baby! Such a blessing. I hope you have a fabulous day!December 7, 2010 at 10:14 pm #72621
Thank you so much for saying that! And how awesome is it that you haven’t binged at all since you started posting – that is something to be seriously proud of. Today, so far, so good… I tried to eat all my meals slowly & thoughtfully so I’d feel satisfied after I was done. And like you said, I stayed busy – wow, does that make a difference. I noticed in a lot of journals that a lot of people first really restricted their calories, and then swung the other direction to bingeing – that was definitely the case with me. So maybe this is more common than I thought?December 7, 2010 at 10:42 pm #72622
hi guys, this forum wil help you so much it has me although ups and downs at least through the downs i have some great friends to get me through them unlike before where i struggled on my own
xxDecember 7, 2010 at 10:46 pm #72623
I have had the same issue where I wanted to lose the weight so I went on a strict diet but then ended up eating one thing bad and beat myself up about it then It was the ALL OR NOTHING. So I just binged for the next few days. Lots of people say on this forum that dieting is not the way. Also not to look at losing weight as the first thing but more like trying to solve the binge eating first. The weight issue will then follow and you can sort that out once you get your binging under control.
I know exactly how you feel, why cant I be normal and yes you do get sooo tired of it. I stayed at home yesterday because I couldnt get out of bed to deal with reality of my life. I used to be sooo skinny and fit like full gym junkie diet FREAK. Now I have gone the complete opposite to not wanting to do anything and binging all the time because of the guilt and disgust I have with myself.
THis forum i believe is going to be a great place to start. I am going to make sure I log in everyday with just one comment here and there. Its really hard this BED I just wish I never ended up down this path. THis forum I believe will be a great help. dont give in. I m not.
oxxoDecember 7, 2010 at 11:13 pm #72624
It is WAY more common that I thought before finding this website. I think most of us restricted too much and that’s definitely what led to the bingeing. I wish someone would have warned me about this beforehand!
Anyway this forum has helped me so much and I hope it does the same for you. Any time I’ve felt like eating when I’m not hungry, I’d just come on here and update about my day, or read other people’s journals and then totally forget about food.
Stay positive and busy!December 8, 2010 at 12:02 pm #72625
I can’t tell you how much it means to me to hear from you! This morning when I woke up, the first thing I thought about was logging in here, instead of what I was going to eat for breakfast. First time in a LONG time.
SAH, thank you for reading my journal, I’ve read some of yours too. This website is so great to feel like we aren’t alone. I like your joint journal too – it’s almost just like having a conversation. Hope you are doing well today & feeling in control.
leish, I was just like you – going to the gym every day, watching what I ate like crazy. Funny that now I can see how stupid that was too. Like one sandwich is going to make me fat. NOT. However, when I down an entire loaf of bread, that probably will… I’m going to try what you’re doing, logging in at least once a day to read & write. How are you doing/feeling today?
KH, I read your new journal. Sounds like you are doing so well – that is so awesome. I totally know what you mean when you said you wished you had known about the bingeing when you were restricting. I’ve thought that so many times. In a way, restricting is just as bad as bingeing. Both unhealthy, I guess. Do you have any more tips other than staying busy (SO important!) and coming here if you feel like you might binge?
So here we go into day 2 BF. A therapist told me it helps to avoid thinking of expectations or goals like a huge mountain – turn them into little anthills. So today, my goal is to eat like a normal person. That’s it. Not lose weight, not work out like a crazy person to burn extra calories. Just eat when I am hungry and stop when I am full.December 10, 2010 at 11:04 am #72626
So last night almost turned into a binge. I ate really well all day and had dessert after dinner. And then – why does this happen??? – after I was done with my dessert, my brain automatically started saying, what else can you eat? What else, what else? So i opened the fridge & started picking, eating peanut butter out of the jar with a spoon… that out of control feeling was getting bigger & bigger. BUT, I tried to hold onto the last 3 days that have been so good, and how good I feel about myself when I am eating normally. Is that instant gratification of tasty food worth feeling like shit afterward? And I was actually able to close the fridge and stop! I am so proud of myself! There have been so many times that I just thought, F— it, I’ve already eaten too much, just keep going.
So it is day # 4 BF. One thing I’m trying really hard to do is be kinder to myself. I know I have a very negative self image which has only gotten worse since I started binge eating. But those awful thoughts about myself aren’t helping, if anything they are making it way, way worse. There are good things about me too, not just bad.December 10, 2010 at 8:03 pm #72627
Hey M! Welcome! Just wanted to say congrats on the past three days…and on reminding yourself that bingeing last night wouldn’t be worth all the shit feelings that follow! Its hard for your mind to wrap itself around the idea that those foods are all ok now and that eating a treat doesn’t enter you into binge territory but the more you practice eating normally, the more your mind gets adjusted and doesn’t feel tempted to turn it into a binge. Awesome you are trying to be kinder to yourself…we have to love and cherish ourselves…thats the most important thing we can do in this life…that way we are fully available to love and cherish others! Hugs, LaurenDecember 10, 2010 at 8:36 pm #72628
Its sad…but i think its true i’m fairly new to this site and been living with this for 12 years and had enough…i too and trying to just do it day by day and hopefully i’ll get there too! x
All your words and support encourage me.ThanksDecember 10, 2010 at 9:33 pm #72629
Lauren – thank you for posting! You are such a positive, hopeful role model. I so admire you for overcoming BED, and still hanging around this website to offer support & advice to all of us. Thank you.
Vickik – it really does help to know we’re all in this together somehow. I have been doing really well today. But I got home from seeing one of my friends and I could just feel that urge to eat. Where does it come from? How long before that part goes away? Does it ever? It’s so f-ing hard to ignore it. I tried coming on this website and reading journals, but initially it’s like I wasn’t even really reading, just scanning the screen & thinking about what I could eat. PB is a big trigger for me, I have such a hard time stopping myself from eating the whole damn jar.
BUT, in the middle of eating PB out of the jar with a spoon, I read a journal entry about how terrible bingeing feels afterwards. Then I ate a cookie. I went back and read some more. And then walked out of the kitchen, instead of eating 10 more cookies and finishing the PB jar, which truthfully is what I wanted to do.
Ten minutes later I can look at that and say, ok, you overate but narrowly avoided a binge. Where did that urge to eat eat eat start? Because I only had one cookie at my friend’s house? Because I am bored? Because I am lonely at home with my baby and food is such good company, at least at first? I’m glad I was able to walk away from eating more, but I’m bummed that I started eating the PB in the first place. One spoonful is fine. Multiple – not so much. Eating out of boredom or loneliness only temporarily solves the problem, and makes other problems elsewhere in my life. I need another outlet. Like writing here!December 11, 2010 at 9:43 pm #72630
Aw thanks honey. You know I think its really great that you are exploring what gave you that urge to binge…that is a big part in recovery because its recognizing our triggers and figuring out what changes we need to make in our lives that helps us begin to get on the path that we want to be on. Glad you are finding writing on here to be a good outlet for you! Keep doing it! hugs, LaurenDecember 12, 2010 at 10:08 pm #72631
I binged yesterday. And kind of today. I feel so guilty. I am so tired of feeling guilty. I guess in comparison to binges in the past, the last 2 weren’t anywhere near as bad as they could have been… it’s like I am able to resist that little voice who says, “keep eating… keep eating…” but only for a short while. I was honest with my husband about yesterday’s binge, but not today’s. It’s so embarassing. What is wrong with me?? Why can’t I just control myself around food?
Lauren – thanks again for posting girl. You’re always so positive! I love it. You make it seem like it is possible for me to have a healthy, NORMAL relationship with food someday sooner rather than later.
Anyway, this weekend was definitely a setback. HOWEVER, there is no peanut butter left in our house and I am not going to buy any for a while. The trouble starts when I have one spoonful and I just want more more more. And if I hadn’t binged yesterday, I wouldn’t have let that guilt lead me to semi-binge today. So we’re starting over again.December 13, 2010 at 11:19 am #72632
Ok… working through that urge to eat… I know part of this is just leftover guilt from the weekend. Also, I’m tired, it’s only 5:15 a.m. and just my son and I are awake. These early mornings are lonely. We slept at my parents’ house last night and there is so much yummy food around, including a giant jar of peanut butter. Food will fill the void momentarily… but it’s just masking the problem! I keep reading – maybe from Lauren? – that it’s ok to feel negative emotions and not immediately stuff them down with food. Just sit with them, feel them, and THEY WILL PASS.December 13, 2010 at 2:17 pm #72633
I did it! I didn’t binge! I did dig into the peanut butter – but before I let it turn into a full-blown bingefest, I stopped myself. I think I was able to stop because I thought, ok, so you want some bread now – have it at lunchtime. You don’t have to eat the whole world right this minute. You can have WHATEVER YOU WANT, when you get hungry again.
Writing it out really helps. Probably will be posting a lot. I opened up with the hubby about this forum & my journal – and let him read it. Yikes. It’s comforting to know he’s on my side & he will help me beat this.
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