Support to stop binge eating, stop emotional eating, and stop overeating.
Laurely81
Member
Hello girls,
Finally i decided to join this forum, I'm an Italian girl and I've been fighting with binge since I was a teenager...and I'll be 29 this year, I have been 45 kg and 70 kgs...now I'm 65 Kg and need to lose 10 kgs in 2 months as I have a cousin's wedding in April and I'm going back home.
It will be hard I know, I have been living in London for about 4 months and my life is starting to settle down now...
Hope to find some support here
Thanks to all of you!
Lauren
Member
Hey welcome to the site...unfortunately most of us have realized that trying to lose weight is what caused the bingeing the first place so first you should focus on having a healthy relationship with food and not on trying to lose 10 kg in 2 months for a wedding. That is too much pressure to put on yourself and will only lead to bingeing. Its about shifting our minds away from the weight loss obsession..thats the key. Welcome! and keep posting!
Sez
Member
Hey Laurely!
Wow your wight def has been up and down,
Glad to know you would like to beat your binging!! Personally I think you should stop focusing on weight loss as that can be a big binging trigger!!
Once you start to overcome your binge eating your weight will probably start to drop off naturally until your body reaches the weight it is most comfortable at!
Exercise also helps.
Have a great day!
Sarah xxx
Laurely81
Member
Hello girls,
thanks a lot for your quick answers! my weight has been up and down so many times...and I know I have to overcome my binge eating, it's so difficult and I am sure you understand me.
I'm quite good during the week as I work so I prepare my lunch at home (which is usually a salad with something else like eggs or tuna or chicken) and in the evening I eat meat or fish and vegetables, the weekend is my main problem, I am home and home is not good for me. I have lots of things to do and new friends I met since I am here but as soon as I am alone food is all I think about
Lauren
Member
I think its because maybe you are eating things that you don't love so you feel like you need to splurge on things you really want on the weekends since you have been restricting a bit during the week. The thing that helps with that is letting yourself have ANYTHING you want in moderation when you are hungry without feeling any guilt about it. Doing that gives you no reason to need to binge on the yummy food at other times when you are alone...
Laurely81
Member
Lauren you read my mind! On Friday we had the welcome drink in the office where I work now, I'm new and my colleagues are really nice, they made me a welcome drink with wine beer juices and crisps. I had just a glass of wine and didn't eat anything else...yesterday and today I don't know how many packets of crisps I had as soon as I was alone. I'm my own worst enemy and I shouldn't be like that because sometimes I am really scared of what I am doing but I just can't stop
Lauren
Member
Hey girl..I know exactly what you mean..I can't tell you how many times I didn't let myself have something and then ended up bingeing on it. So you see it is really important to let yourself eat what you really want. Give yourself that permission, eat slowly and savor each bite, and never feel bad about it. We are meant to love and enjoy the things we eat. You can do this. Just take small steps to reintroducing forbidden/bad foods back into your daily food plan. Hugs, Lauren
Nat
Member
Hey Laurely,
I can relate to what you have said so much. I used to want to drop weight so badly and I knew how to do it too, that's why my weight could go up and down so quickly. But it always lead to me binging and it became worse and worse over time. I agree with the girls, you shouldn't worry about you actual 'weight' but instead change your focus to being a healthy, happy person and your weight will follow. You can still lose weight without being obsessive. Sometimes I kid myself when I'm good during the week, I pretend I'm just being healthy but really - subconsciously I'm restricting my diet and then I binge on the weekend. The time when I really felt that I was improving was when I was eating intuitively alllll the time. Weekends made no difference to what I ate. I then felt like i was on the road to recovery and was much happier. Once you get rid of 'forbidden' food, you will be less likely to crave them and be able to have sweets every day and not binge 
I know it's easier said than done but just want you to know that I understand how you feel and trying to drop that weight so quickly will only back track you on the road to recovery. xxxxx
Sez
Member
Heya,
Ditto to the above!!
I used to not eat anything in front of people and then get home sit down and chow through 12 pieces if cheese on toast.
Hope you have a better day tomorrow.
xo Sarah
Laurely81
Member
Hello girls,
thanks for all your support, today my manager took some banana chocolate in the office...I tried a couple and then I stopped, now I will prepare dinner and I have only healthy food in the fridge so I will be fine.
Sez I understand perfectly what you mean...and I did it as well too, just imagine how good parmesan can be!
Laurely81
Member
Oh girls one question, there is a problem I have, I can't cry.
I don't know if this is related to binge (like for food we keep everything in our body I also keep tears in my eyes), but I feel sometimes that I really need to cry...but I can't. It's so annoying, people think that I am not sensitive at all...or I am very strong but tears are inside me
Lauren
Member
Hmm I have heard some people say that before..are you taking an antidepressant by any chance? I've heard that with those.... hmm well maybe one day you'll get out a good crying session. glad you were able to have a few pieces of banana chocolate and then stopped! Enjoy your dinner! Hugs, Lauren
Laurely81
Member
I'm not taking any antidepressant, I don't take medicines at all. Have you ever seen the movie "The Holiday" with Cameron Diaz, Jude Law...in this movie Cameron Diaz is not able to cry...well when I saw it for the first time I said, well that's me! And at the end she manages to cry...
Nat
Member
Hey Laurely, nice work with the banana chocolate With the crying, I am the same and not taking any medication either. I used to cry really easily but since I started dieting and then binging I find it really hard to cry too. I can't remember the last time I had a big sook. I think the binging stops us from feeling true emotion. Don't worry though, once we have this binging sorted and let ourselves 'feel' again Im sure the tears will come-a-floodin! xx
tara
Member
Hey Laurely,
We can do this! I watched the movie (The Holiday)and I am guessing that you are burrying your emotions. Can you dig deeper and figure out what it is that is upsetting you? I know that my binges started for a reason. Now I do it out of habit to cope with daily stress , fight boredome, etc.. On a physical level I began bingeing after I started dieting to reach a more perfect weight. However, on an emiotional level when I started to binge, it was to cope with a deeper problem I think it was during adolescence when my dad and step-mom were getting a divorce. I was extremely insecure and could never express my feelings as I was always worried that someone would be upset with me. I think that is how it began, add to it that I never truly had a good mother figure. Eventhough I am much better at expressing myself now, I still can't cope when things get tough. i am unfortunately a very much "all or nothing " person. I hate that.
I hope you can search within your soul to see what the roots of this are.
The best thing I am starting to learn about this forum is that you can say whatever is on your mind, no inhibitions no embarrassment no shame.
Take care
You are gonna look great for that wedding by the time April comes
Lauren
Member
Hmm girl well I'm not sure why you aren't able to cry...maybe its a control issue where you don't want to let loose and have a good ball out...hopefully you'll get to the point where you can have a good cry! I actually like that...but I can't remember the last time I cried either.
Sez
Member
That's strange about not being able to cry.. it comes so easy for me, just watching a TV soap I can be in tears lol... Kinda the opposite to you i guess. Did you ever cry as a kid? Did your parents ever cry in front of you?
I know I got my crying from my old man, he cries in just about every movie...
Laurely81
Member
Well...Tara I think you got the right answer, I think I have some problems inside me not solved and I need to find what's wrong and solve them. It's not easy, I have to dig inside my mind and it's quite scary
By the way, tonight I went to the gym and I have booked classes for Thursday too, I'm so glad I feel so good after I go to the gym!
excrisis
Member
Hey Laurely,
I wasn't able to cry for months and months while binging. Just couldn't do it. Felt so depressed and shitty, but nonetheless couldn't cry. Its like the binging pushed down ALL of my emotions, except guilt and depression.
I have been able to have a few good cries, but crying is still not easy for me. But the emotions are slowly coming back, and I am sure they will come back for you too. Its good to hear someone else have this problem, I thought I was the only one who couldn't cry!
Keep it up,
Stephanie
Laurely81
Member
Hi Stephanie! Well, good for me to know I'm not the only one!!
Thanks for the post
Sez
Member
Great work on the gym Laurely!!
Have a good night.
xxx Sez
Laurely81
Member
Hello girls, sorry for not writing this weekend my mum and my brother came to London to see me and I was busy with them.
It was strange, after 4 months I saw them and my mum started to tell me that I have to go back to Italy and stay with her and my dad but I am happy here and trying to live by myself so, at the moment I am staying in London.
Today it was my first day without binging, I had nice breakfast tea with biscuit, then a yogurt, for lunch a salad with turkey, in the afternoon an apple and for dinner a carrot & coriander soup and some vegetables.
I am happy, I managed not to eat any chocolate or buy biscuits or junk food at the supermarket on my way home from the office.
Nat
Member
Nice to have you back Laurely! Your day sounds spot on, good job on not binging or avoiding junk food at the shops. Why do your parents want you to go to Italy with them, if you dont mind me asking? Keep staying positive girly
Sez
Member
Hey Laurely! Sounds like you had a good weekend. Well done on avoiding the binge =)
Remember to allow yourself a little of what you want each day, that way you won't crave it and give into a binge!!!
xox Sarah
Lauren
Member
Hey girl...glad you have had a good day today!! Stay strong and keep it up! Hugs, Lauren
Rage
Member
Hey Laurely,
If you're happy in London, let it be then!
I live abroad and sometime feel some pressure from my family, like they have just a rough time I feel guilty of not being with them. I accepted recently though I have to lead my life and being closer to them may not help at all so sod it, tough I know, but I have to make myself happy. That's how I keep strong on this one.
Well done for the gym! It really brings a great feeling!
The crying bit... same here. When I feel I have to let it out, like a purge, I switch on some music that will trigger so many memories that I won't resist (weirdly don't cry from the guns n roses works a treat for me - oh and yesterday il mio rifugio from Ricahrd Cocciante). Then I feel tired, get a good sleep, and feel a bit newer.
It's great you have already made friends in London, keep the social life up!
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