Tips to stop overeating, stop emotional eating, stop eating fast food, stop eating junk food
Home › Binge Eating Forum › Binge Eating Support – General Comments, Questions, and Posts › Me+Stress=Binge
June 29, 2010 at 6:20 pm #2207
Hi, I’m new here; I just discovered this site today. I figured this would help, since I can’t really find any support anywhere else.
So here’s the deal: I’ve been struggling with binge eating for about 2-3 years now. Before it started happening, I was quite slim and maybe a little chubby. However, I didn’t see that; I thought I was incredibly fat. So I started exercising excessively, and became obsessed with calories. I was so obsessed that presently I can remember what the calories are in most foods or at least make a guess and be surprisingly close (sounds somewhat impressive, but it’s actually annoying and quite sad since I don’t WANT to remember these things). I would eat foods only if they had a low amount of calories. I wouldn’t pay attention to what was actually in them, so I would end up eating something like a 60 calorie pudding as a snack without caring about the fact that it contained ingredients that I couldn’t even pronounce. As a result I looked very unhealthy back then (face was filled with acne, and I always looked really pale and tired), despite being skinny. I’ve always wanted to be skinny “so that I could look pretty”. Obviously, I was pretty stupid. Before I knew it, I just couldn’t handle the way I was eating. I got stressed out frequently over school, my body, and whatnot–so I went to food.
Eventually I gained more weight than I had lost previously.
Now I don’t binge as much as I did then (I would eat a whole box of cereal alone in my room, or maybe 6 slices of bread with butter in a corner of the kitchen. sometimes I would cry while doing this). So that’s a good thing. But even though the binges are smaller, I still binge at least once a day. Despite exercising almost everyday (cardio+strength training) and eating foods that aren’t too processed, I still can’t stop binging. It’s still ruling my life.
If I’m stressed (whether the good or bad kind of stress) I go to the kitchen, sit, and eat. I just don’t have control! I thought preoccupying myself with reading, homework, photography (kind of a hobby of mine), cleaning, or just listening to music would stop it. But it doesn’t. I keep regressing. It’s like this: I’m feeling normal, then I start feeling stressed, then I binge eat and I feel much more better, but then right after I binge I suddenly hate the world. It’s ridiculous and annoying.
(Sorry, I think I wrote too much… haha)June 29, 2010 at 6:46 pm #56421
Hello Shawie – welcome to the forum!
I can speak fluent calorie too – I could practically tell you how many cals there are in a table leg! Like you, I don’t want to think like this, but it’s difficult to change this mindset.
Reading others’ journals on this site is helping me to start thinking in a more relaxed way about food, instead of the binge-diet-binge cycle I kept going through before coming on to this forum.
The great thing about this site is that we are all in the same boat, and can all understand where you’re coming from!
Carmilla xxJune 29, 2010 at 7:14 pm #56422
Hi there. I’m new too, I just posted for the first time today. I totally empathize with you. Before I started binging, I was insane about every calorie that went into and out of my body. Somehow that stopped when I “discovered” binging. Now it seems like I can’t stop binging, and worst of all, the binging keeps me from the gym. I LOVE working out. Anyone who knows me knows that getting in and training or going to a spin class is one of my great joys. But when I’m in the midst of a binge cycle, I don’t want to even put on my gym clothes, or go work out knowing that I have a stomach full of food sloshing around. So then I put off the gym until I think the cycle’s over, knowing all the while that simply going to work out is often enough to break the cycle.
I really commend you for sticking with what’s important to you, and for coming this far. From my experience, cutting back is way way better than not cutting back, even if you can’t quit altogether yet. You’ll find a way to get there, to the end of it, I know, just as I know I will, one day, too. Maybe the key is reminding yourself of your priorities. I do this all the time when I’m studying. Sunday, for instance, I felt like quitting studying early, after I ate dinner. But then I reminded myself that I had turned down dinner with my boyfriend and his family in order to study, and if I were to quit studying at 7, I might as well go spend time with my boyfriend. That re-prioritizing was enough to keep me studying until 11 PM. Perhaps you could do this with your workouts – reminding yourself that the binge is counter-productive to all the hard work you do in the gym, that every bite you take is a slap in the face to everything you value so much, may be a good mantra to keep you away from the refrigerator (and I do the bread thing too, exactly that way). I’ll try to do the same.
Best of luck! I’m here for you.
KirstenJune 29, 2010 at 7:58 pm #56423
@Carmilla: Thanks for the support! I guess this is a good site after all, since like you said, we’re all in pretty much the same boat.
@ kutiekristy10: Welcome, and thanks for the advice I, too, love working out, so I can understand how binge eating just ruins it. I’ll definitely try to remind myself more of my priorities. I tried something like this before, except it was a more disciplined thing. Like, I would promise myself that if I did binge eat, I would have some sort of “punishment”. Sounds weird, yes, but the punishments would be stuff like suffering that awful feeling afterwards, or having to stay upstairs for the rest of the day (since my kitchen is downstairs). So, they would be negative stuff. From you’re suggestion, I’m thinking that I should focus more on my goal to becoming healthy, all my hard work at the gym, and positive-ish stuff like that than just the negatives. Thanks again, and I wish you luck!
(Haha, well at least we’re not alone when it comes to the “bread thing”.)June 29, 2010 at 9:55 pm #56424
Hey there..just wanted to say welcome to the forum! I used to binge out of stress all the time and then like you said, would feel that temporary relief followed by hatred for everything and everyone! The thing that has helped me has been just learning to be ok with feeling stressed out….generally the feeling won’t kill you, so coming to realize that helps a lot. If there is something I can do to relieve the stress by getting something done, or venting about something to a friend or on here, I’ll do it….but if its out of my control, I just sit with those feelings until they get better on their own, cause in the end bingeing only helps for about 5 minutes, then you are way worse off then when you started! Glad you’re here with us! ~Lauren
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