Support to stop binge eating, stop emotional eating, and stop overeating.
jacquirsw1
Member
You did so well to get through last night without binging that is brilliant and something you can be really proud of.
It is going to be difficult if you do decide that your relationship is at an end, but that is not going to be anything like as difficult as it will be if you are not right for each other and stay in the relationship because you feel you should, or because you are afraid not to be in it.
Jacqui
piggypie
Member
Hi Hope (:
Although I cannot relate to your boyfriend issue directly, my sister had a issue a few years ago. She had been with her boyfriend for 3 years and she couldn't imagine being with anyone else. The last 6 months or so things really got bad. They were fighting NONSTOP. In the time they were together, she lost all of her friends and he was holding her back from doing a lot of the things she wanted to do. She was really scared to end things with him because he had been her first "real" boyfriend and she didn't know anything different. She was also scared because she was going to be heading out in life starting from scratch. She'd have to make new friends, find new hobbies, etc. So she was terrified. But in the end, she ended it. And it was all for the better. If you know if your heart that it isn't right, then trust that. It is kind of like learning to ride a bike. You learn to ride with training wheels and imagining riding without them is scary. But you have to do it. And when you do, you can go so much further.
I hope things work out for you. Don't let the stress get to you. (:
alannah09
Member
So to echo everyone else...you are doing amazing foodwise. It is always hard to control cravings when you are concerned about other issues. I am kind-of having the same problem (except I have only been with mine for 1 year) I don't know if you guys are fighting..I don't think I have ever had a fight with mine...we just don't even hang out that much..or literally talk that much! he has crazy parents but its still weird..and weirder..I really though about it and I would much rather just be friends with him and stop worrying about it. I just sat for a long time and really tried to figure out my feelings and talked to my sister for a while and that kept me from turning to food...or doing introspective thinking with a bag of chips sitting in front of me..or ice cream or whatever which I tend to do..think and snack..which is very bad. Just really think about your feelings and talk to someone who knows you really well and I am sure you will figure things out. And if you can't...write about it here! we will all help as much as you can.
p.s. If you know he is not right for you...you might be 494058543890 times happier with someone else you don't even know and won't meet until you end things. But, do what your heart/gut/whatever tells you is right. And if you need to start over without him..all of us and all your friends will be there for ya!
Hope777
Member
Hey guys wow thanks for all of the wonderful support it is amazing being able to come here and talk about my problems with you all. You all really helped me through a tough time yesterday. I was defiantly tested with my emotional eating yesterday but i am so happy to report that i didn't give in! In the past yesterday would have been a day that just pushed me over the edge and caused me to binge. I was feeling super depressed but knew i had to get my mind off everything and even though i REALLY wanted that food relief i literally ran to my car to get out a bad situation and went to my friends house. I didn't want to go at all and wasn't even sure i would feel better once i got there but i did. I forgot about my problems and didn't think about food as much. So i guess the lesson i learned from this experience is that even if i dont think getting away or getting myself out of a bad situation will help, it will, no matter what lol. I have noticed that my stomach is actually growling more at night so i may need more calories than i am eating after all.
After a good nights sleep I feel 100 times better today and havnt really had any cravings. I also allowed myself to have more fattning foods today because i think i have not been getting enough. I feel better about the situation with my boyfriend and am def. thinking about ending things. Thanks for putting up with all of my problems and reaching out to me when i needed it!!!!!! 
jacquirsw1
Member
I am soooooooooooooooooooo glad that you are feeling better today in yourself.
Well done for getting yourself out of the situation yesterday that is pretty amazing and you are right you definitely learnt something there.
It does sound as though you maybe need to eat more during the day.
I hope that you do get to a decision about the bf, you do what is right for you and whatever happens will be good.
Jacqui
Hope777
Member
So i decided to eat a little more yesterday and have some more filling things at night (oatmeal,butter popcorn,hot chocolate). This morning i woke up and didnt feel as if my stomach was caving in so yay to that! When i am satisfied and not too hungry i usually end up forgetting about food rather than obsessing about it. So hopefully today should be a better day food-wise :). I have been hanging out with my friends alot more rather than my bf, just needing some time away from him. I am so grateful i have my friends, and this forum :). Anyways i expect to have less cravings today now that i up my calories a little yesterday!
icecreamjunkie
Member
hope i am so proud of you for not letting your struggles with your relationship effect your eating habits!
alannah09
Member
yay! great job with food. I am glad nights are going better too. That can be a sort of weird complicated balance. I do drink hot chocolate at night quite a bit though and I really like doing that. You didn't really eat too many cals at night though..more just filling things so that sounds great. keep it up!
Hope777
Member
Hey guys. So i had my first "binge" yesterday that i havnt had in ages. Wouldnt you know it, it happened after a day of drinking alcohol at the lake. That morning i had a hardy breakfast to because i knew i would be drinking all day so i had eggs 2 toaster waffle type things and hot chocolate (normal breakfast) then i went out for my run. On the way to the lake we stopped and got a sub i got a veggie delight. Then once on the lake we were drinking all day ( the only thing i had on the boat were some crackers). Afterwards we decided to go get dinner. At dinner i split breadsticks with my friend and i had four. Then i ordered a house salad with honey mustard sauce. I felt super full once i was done and didnt finish my salad, decided to take it home. I was feeling kind of guilty about pigging out on breadsticks and i had also drank alot of water so my stomach just felt full. I also didnt really know what to do with myself once i was home so i guess i was kinda stressed out about it? Also i was upset about boyfriend stuff (we kinda broke up).I think all of this lead me to once i got home i ate the rest of my salad and a cookie and 2 slices of bread with butter. I was able to stop myself after that and i went to go take a shower. I mean i dont really think it was a ton of food or anything but i do think i was eating for the wrong reasons, i def. was not hungry when i got home but still ate. My stomach was so full, this may be because i drank alot of water and i think my stomach has shrank a little overall but still, i thought about purging after eating all of this. The only thing that stopped me from doing that is i thought about what advice i would give one of you who just did that and obviously it wouldnt be to purge. It would be get your mind of eating, leave the situation. After that i decided i really just needed to go to sleep so thats what i did. I woke up about two hours later and still had the thought of bingeing in my mind but i didnt, i went back to sleep. Overall i guess i have just been doing SO well lately that a little mess up freaked me out. Luckily i was able to control it a little bit. Thats why it is so important to check in with myself everyday and remind myself what i need to do to become normal with food. I just woke up and had my normal breakfast and am planning to have a normal day. One little binge isn't going to throw me off the wagon
jacquirsw1
Member
It is brill that you are not going to let this bring you down.
You are right you have been doing really well so it is not surprising that this knocked you a little but I think you have coped admirably with it, and the fact that you managed to get through it all without purging is really good.
I hope today goes well for you
Jacaui
Hope777
Member
Hey guys! Feeling so much better today. Ate normally yesterday and didnt think about food much. Finding new way to spend my time, reading, hanging out with friends, ect. Feeling/looking better everyday. cheers to that.
Hope777
Member
Still eating normally, going to bed feeling a little hungry everynight and waking up very hungry. I may need to eat a little more since I bumped up my running. Kind of in a rut about going out with friends and just decided to get out there. Ended up having alot of fun. I need to make myself get out more. Sometimes i dont go out because I am scared i will eat or something and dont want to ruin the rest of the night however eating should not determine if i go out and have fun or not.
Anna
Member
Hi Hope! You're doing brilliant! If you do more sports and feel hungry before going to bed - you can have a few pieces of wallnuts or almonds, a little saturated fat and protein will also help the regeneration of the muscles over night!
Keep going!
jacquirsw1
Member
Oh hon that is absolutely brilliant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am so glad that you took the plunge and just did it and that it went well. If you are having fun you are less likely to eat to the point where you are stressed anyway which isgreat and you will have such a boost it is sooo worth it.
Jacqui
Hope777
Member
Hey guy thanks!
Yesterday was a pretty normal day again. I worked all day so when i got home i was super tired and cranky. After dinner i wanted a little more so i kept snacking (within my calorie range but still finished a little early in the night) I took some gummy treats outside while i read my book and wanted to go back in for more, but stopped myself and realized i only wanted them for emotional reasons and stoped myself. I really wanted more but then my boyfriend called and i went to go help him move out. I didnt think about food the rest of the night so i guess just getting out of a situation really helps.
stay at home mom
Member
HI Hope: that's great to recognize when you cross into purely emotional eating. If there's no one to call you out of the house, I find it helpful to switch from eating-after-eating to drinking something lo-cal like soda water, decaff or whatever. Getting extra full from fluid seems to kill the need for extra solids.
If you're happy with your size now, then bumping up calories to match bumping up running is a good idea. Or, if it's entirely acceptable that you're a size or two bigger if you cut down running, then no change to eating will suit you too
Helen
jacquirsw1
Member
It is soo brill that you recognised that emotional urge and managed to deal with it without resulting to continuing the eating. You have done really well with this be proud, and as Helen says you know that getting out of a situation can help you get through it now so that is something you can use if the emotional eating comes up again.
Hope777
Member
Hm, so i just had the urge to binge. I gave in..a little..I finished my regular calories for the day but didnt feel satisfied. i started having some chips while watching tv. I usually dont allow myself to eat while doing other activities but i have been a little more flexable lately (eating a little while reading, or watching tv) so i guess i need to buckle down on that a little more. Anyways, after eating some of the chips i could tell i was eating for emotional reasons.. I decided to do what works best when I really feel like bingeing, i sat down at the table and ate with utinsals plates, ect. I had a tortilla with butter. After i was done i kinda still wanted something else but i was able to pull myself away and get ready for bed. I have a couple ideas for why i wanted to binge:
1. I have been really bored all day. I was able to avoid emotinal eating most of the day by reading, going on a walk, ect but its nightime and i dont really have much to do. I wanted to hang out with my friends but everyone is getting ready to go back to school and not doing much tonight. So i was left alone very bored and i wanted something to entertain me (aka food)
2. I am still a little confused about my love life and avoiding dealing with it.
3. I have been doing really well lately with sticking to my calories and still havnt bumped them up since i have been exercising more so maybe i am not getting enough caloires or not eating enough fat?
Maybe its just a little of all 3. Overall i just had a hard time today. Its hard for me not to be doing something, if i am just sitting around relaxing i feel like i should be doing something. It almost like i just feel guilty when i dont have anything to do. Perhaps i just need another hobby or something to keep me occupied.
Anyways, i feel okay now and my cravings have stopped. this is a good thing bc tonight was def. a night that could have turned into a huge binge. I hope i can just figure out how to manage when i am bored. My goal for the rest of this week is to eat at the table and not while i am doing other things.
lasqueen
Member
Hope777: I find that boredom and guilt are two quite triggering emotions (if you consider boredom an emotion). Moreover, guilt due to boredom (due to idleness) is probably one of the worst triggers. Good job on overcoming that! Sometimes when I feel bored and idle (and subsequently guilty and thinking about food), I get in the kitchen and cook. Something about being around food and making something with it is therapeutic and it almost satisfies my desire for food (that is if I am not truly hungry). This could backfire however if you are tempted to eat everything you cook!
Hope777
Member
Hi Lasqueen! Thanks for the input. I think thats a great idea to find something non-stesssfull to do. I think that i would probably eat whatever i cooked or at least snack but i came up with the idea that i am going to watch my fav. show on my laptop when i get bored.
7/29
Yesterday was an okay day. I decided not to count calories after dinner. Sometimes counting makes me feel like I HAVE to eat a certain amount of calories which puts some stress on me if I go over or under. I am trying to just listen to my hunger more. I had a bit to drink at the fair with my friends. After, when we got back home to my friends house I had some chips and some bean things. I don’t think the beans were many calories and I actually stopped eating before my little stash of chips were gone so I was proud of myself for being able to stop and not feel like I have to eat the whole thing. I have been snacking more lately when I am cooking food or just in the kitchen I am not overdoing it but It still worries me a bit. Does anyone have any tips on not snacking? I like to just eat regular meals but I always end up grabing a little piece of a cookie or something afterwards. I guess I could just add the cookie to my meal in the first place, maybe that would take care of it. I have been doing better eating at the table. I saw a picture of me today in my swim suit and I looked great! However, once I think I look great I am always worried that I will gain weight and not look so good anymore. Also worried about gaining weight for my sisters wedding, although not sure why I am even scare of gaining weight bc I have been doing well with my eating. Just snacking a little bit more but still no major binges. Maybe I am just being to nit-picky and should look at the big picture. I am doing well with my eating and not bingeing, I am going out with my friends more and living more normally.
piggypie
Member
Hope- that is so great that you are able to be happy with yourself and the way you look!!! I definitely know the feeling that once you get "comfortable" you become terrified of gaining weight and will do anything to prevent that...
But it seems like you have been eating healthy and well for awhile and I think looking at the big picture is the best idea. If you feel you are snacking too much, try to keep "safe" snack foods around. I always have grapes, baby carrots and sugar free jello. That way if I feel a little hungry I can have a few grapes or something and not feel guilty or like I've blown it. Also- they are more healthy than snacking on chips or crackers! Also, if you plan on having a cookie or something every day, the need to snack might go away because you know that you will have it later! I hope this helps a little! Keep up the good work! (:
Hope777
Member
Thanks PiggyPie! I tried keeping some healthy snacks yesterday and it totally worked. When i was making dinner i snacked on some grapes and this flavored water and it totally worked!
Yesterday was a much better day and i noticed if i stop counting calories for the day once i get to dinner i feel better about the whole day. I know i am not overdueing my caloires but i am not forced to eat all my calories or if i go a little over its no big deal. It actually helps me stay busy at night and accept invatations to go out because i am not worrying about my food. Last night i went to the fair again with my friends and once we got home i had a 100 calorie pack of popcorn, a couple chips, and a cocnut water and after that was able to stop, watch a movie,and go to sleep.
jacquirsw1
Member
you did really well hon !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hope777
Member
Well I think the not counting calories after dinner is helping me alot. Last night at about 10:00my friend begged me to go out with her. In the past i would have declined because i would be scared i would go out and eat or drink and add on more calories. Last night was different i didnt think about going over calories or food or anything. In fact no food thought crossed my mind i just had fun. I may have gone a little over caloies (in the past would have lead me to a binge)but not now! Today i just woke up and ate normally. Some days i go a little over in caloires, other days i go a little under. I am not even counting calories at all today, just sticking to eating every three hours. Seems to be working!
Its so funny because all the times i overeat a little really dosnt make a difference inmy weight or anything. Its all the times i freak-out about over eating and binge that made the difference. Just being more gental with yourself really pays off.
Hope777
Member
Yeserday was a pretty good day overall. I didnt count calories at all and just stuck to eating every three hours. I was a little stressed out about some boy stuff and ate a litttle more than intended a couple hours before bed. I was able to stop myself though and i wrote about it so i dont really feel bad. Feeling good today and its super nice out so i think i can do alot outside
jacquirsw1
Member
Glad you are feeling positive. you did really well yesterday to not let that bit of overeating turn into a binge.
jacqui
Hope777
Member
Hello,
Yesterday was a really good day. I ate every three hours and didnt count calories. I usually have a hard time eating food in which i dont know the calorie content but i was able push that aside yesterday. My mom made vegan tortillia type things and i had one. It was really good and im pretty sure it was pretty healthy. Anyways, i ate one and then decided i was full, so it was good that i didnt overeat or binge just because i didnt know that calorie content which might have happend in the past. Also, i went to a friends house to spend the night and all of my friends were eating popcorn. I wasnt hungry at all and had already brushed my teeth so I didnt have any. they were all like--"you too skinny" "you need to eat some" which in the past may have lead me to feel guilty, but i didnt let it affect me and i didnt have any of the popcorn. I knew i had 3 meals and 2 snacks and i ate enough for the day already so i just said no thanks without feeling guilty.
I noticed something else about one of my friends. I think she has an eating disorder because she is always on some sort of diet, calling herself fat, and her weight flexuates alot. Last night i think she was bingeing because she kept going back to the kitchen to get more and more chips (and she usually eats nothing). She also seemed very anxious, and she went to the bathroom a couple times coughing (i think she was throwing up). Then she decided to just go home when the movie wasnt over yet. I really want to help her but i dont really know how to approach her about it. She also said she gained a bunch of weight over the summer eariler that night (she dosnt look like she did). Does anyone have any suggestions of how i could help her?
jacquirsw1
Member
WOW you have had a really brilliant day it is great.
re friend
I think what I would do is rather than try and talk to her about whether she has issues with food would be to open up about how I feel about food so that she understands if there is a problem that she is not alone, and by opening up to her I would hope that at some point she might trust opening up to me if she needed to.
jessie09
Member
Hey i think you've been doing really well! I'm not overweight but I do wish to be happy about the way I look, like you are with yourself.
I think it would be great if you could talk to your friend about your own binge-eating issue then you two can keep both of your eating problems as a secret. I've never met anyone whom I suspect have a binge-eating problem but I always wish I could share it in person with someone who's been there
Hope777
Member
Thanks guys. Thats a great idea, i think i might try to tell her about my own experience although it may be hard for me to do.
Jessie--it took me a while to finally accept my body. Sometimes i still have trouble. Although i am not overweight i just love having a strong body because i am very active and carrying around extra weight holds me back. When my binge eating got really bad i could hardly exercise because i would feel so sick. I felt so bad about my body. However, when i started this process of getting better and i would feel bad about my body i would allow myself to cry, feel bad about it, then forget about it and do whatever i was about to do (ex-go swimming, go out). I told myself that feeling bad about my body and staying home would do nothing postive for me and that eventually i would loose the extra weight i was carrying around as long as i didnt diet. i really tried hard not to let my bad feelings about my body hold me back. I think no matter how much i weight there will be some days i wish i were a little skinnier. It just happens when you have had an eating disorder. However, i now know how to handle it.
Overall yesterday was a great day. Stuck to eating every three hours. Not really focused on food. Did have a little craving at night because i was bored. I turned on a movie to get my mind off it and it worked.
Hope777
Member
Did well yesterday. Noticed that i had too small of a mid-day snack because i could hardly wait for dinner then i had a bigger than normal dinner. Also had a snack at my friends house without over-doing it. yay
alannah09
Member
Hey..sorry I haven't been around for a little. It sounds like you have been doing really well the last week! I know this is a kind of late response, and I don't know if you already talked to her, but I was thinking that you should really think about how you are going to talk to your friend. I think telling her about your own experience is a great idea if your comfortable with it, but I know from experience (as do you, maybe) that people talking to me about my eating disorders (when they noticed them) was always a terribly awkward conversation that usually resulted in me being mad at them, usually for a short time, but you def. have to be prepared for her to respond really badly. I am sure she will thank you in the end, but she may be really mad at you at the beginning! For example, when my mom told me she noticed my binging...what I felt like she was telling me was that she noticed my weight gain, so if your friend is already super concerned about her weight she may feel like your telling her she is fat, so emphasizing that it is an unhealthy habit, even for people who are really skinny may be helpful as well. Sorry I am rambling so much and you may have already thought of everything I have said....but yeah..ill stop. Im glad your doing so well!
Hope777
Member
Thanks Alannah! its great to have you back. Thats what i was scared of, that she would be really upset. I most likely wouldnt want someone to confront me about it but maybe just opening up to her about myself would be helpful and maybe she could talk about it. Shes leaving to go back to school today so idk if ill get a chance to talk to her but ill just keep an eye out for her.
Yesterday was a good day overall. I felt a little more hungry yesterday than normal, not really sure why. I stopped counting calories after dinner. I knew i was going to go out with my friends and if i went over calories i knew i might freak out a little. To prevent that i just kinda tricked myself into not knowing how many calories i had (lol). It worked though. I think i went a little over calories as i drank a little bit and had a couple chips and a lollie pop. I am just glad that i went out though, in the past i wouldnt go out for fear that i would eat or i was just too busy thinking about not eating to go out. I would sit at home alone and bored and sometimes end up bingeing. I think eating a little extra is alot better than sitting at home and bingeing so i am proud of myself. Also, i was up really late and when i got home i didnt even snack or anything (in the past def. would have happend). I slept extra late and was super hungry for breakfast. I wasnt really satisfied after so i had a bowl of cereal. Idk why i havnt been feeling satisfied lately i have been really active though so that could be one cause. It just freaks me out a little when i eat a little extra even when i am not bingeing. I am def. still seeing results though so i dont think i need to worry about it too much.
Nicole
Member
Maybe it's 'what' ypur eating thats leaving you unsatisfied.. maybe you need more protein or soemthing with the exercsie?
Hope777
Member
ugh- something just happend that made me so mad. I was on a bikride with my dad and he said something like, " i bet you will thin out once you start getting older" To me this meant that i had some thinning out to do and that i was fat. I think he new it bothered me so he also said, "you dont have much body fat but you are just strong" to me meant again that i wasnt skinny i was fat or big. I was JUST starting to feel good about my body then someone has to go and say something about it. I know he didnt mean it to be mean or rude and maybe most people wouldnt take it that way but i def. did. I decided to come here and journal about it instead of taking my anger out on food. I wish everyone would just keep there ideas about my body to themselves. Now i am going over to my friends house to swim and i am going to feel big and fat and i kinda feel bloated today anyways. 
stay at home mom
Member
Hi Hope: I find it really strange that your dad would think you're trying to thin out any more. You mentioned in a different post that you're down to size 1-2 clothes...that's quite lean by most peoples' judgments. Is it possible he was trying to be supportive but the wording came out all wrong? Or, are your parents skinny-centric? Anyhow, hope you feel better later and realize there's lots of gray between black and white.
Helen
alannah09
Member
I don't know about your dad but I know mine wants for me what I want for myself most of the time...he knows very little about any eating disorder I have had. I was thinking if he said something like that to me what he probably meant was that I should stop worrying about the way I look so much because the weight will come off to where I want it to be overtime. That said...I have no clue what your relationship with your dad is like and I don't know him o I really have no clue..but maybe he meant something like that. Dads arent used to eating disorders or dieting and they really don't know what to say even when they really want to say something..so who knows.
Hope777
Member
I had a little binge last night. I didn’t do too much harm but I was def. eating for comfort. I had 2 servings of ice cream with wiped cream and sprinkles. A handful of chex mix. A spoonful of peanut butter. And two peices of bread. I cant help but feel discouraged after all of the progress I have been making I just feel like I took two steps back. I wish I could have went back and just did something to not eat. Its over now, theres nothing I can do so I am just going to try to figure out what caused it.
1.I think part of it was bc of the thing my dad said to me about thinning out. I felt a little bloated today also. When I was laying out with my friends I also felt kind of big. So I guess just being upset about my body. (p.s. my dad probably was not saying it in to make me loose weight or anything, it really wouldnt matter what size i was to him, i think he was just saying it. He said that he started to thin out when he got older but still it just makes me think that i could loose more weight but i am trying to let it go)
2. Some of my friends are wanted to go out last night and i reeeally didnt feel like going. I think stress from feeling like I have to go out caused it a little bit.
3. I have been a little more snackie lately with my food and a cut myself a little slack with my exercise so just not eating/exercising perfectly throws me off a little bit and makes me feel guilty.
4. Hanging out with my “friend” who is always pressuring me and kinda making me feel bad about myself. She also makes me feel bad about my boyfriend trouble. I just feel like she is always rude to me.
Finally I was eating in front of the TV again and this is where my usual overeating happens. I was able to stop my binge by sitting down at the table and eating ( the bread). After I did this I was able to stop. So I guess its good that I can stop myself I just didn’t want any over-eating at all. I am going to forgive myself though. I am going to continue eating normally and not restrict. I woke up this morning and didnt feel bad or anything so i know it couldnt have been too bad. I had my breakfast as normal and was totally satisfied after. I really have not been feeling satisfied after breakfast so i dont think i was getting enough calories for all the exercising i am doing. I am going to bump up my intake a bit and see if that helps. Also, i really focused on tasting the food i was eating. Usually i read at the table but i think that just distracts me so i am not going to do that anymore.
jacquirsw1
Member
You have not taken any steps back at all.
I am really Proud (not being patronising) that you managed to do all of that and stop your binge by going and sitting at the table. The fact that in the middle of the binge you recognised that by doing that you could help end it is amazing and something tou really be proud of.
You have been able to recognise the triggers so maybe next time if you were in the same situation you might be able to deal with it differently.
I am so glad that you got up and didn't feel guilty and bad about it because there is no reason that you should.
Jacqui
Hope777
Member
Thanks Jacqui!
Yesterday was a great day eating wise. I wasnt as hungry as normal days in the earlier part of the day (probably because of my small binge) but i still ate small meals every three hours. Later in the day i made big progress. My friends and I all had planned to go out to eat. I was debating weather or not i was going to go. I felt like i should probably stayed at home and made a healthy dinner. Then i thought about it and that wouldn't really be normal eating because i would be declining a dinner invitation just because i was scared about what food i would eat. So i went. I had a veggie-burger on a wheat bun with french fries. Usually i would have gotten the vegetable side but i decided to get french fries and try something i really wanted. I only ate half of the fries and half o f the burger, then i was full and didnt eat anymore! I actually stopped when i was full! I think if i would have gotten the vegetable side i would have eaten both of them bc i would feel less satisfied. I didnt end up getting home until around 1:30, i was kinda hungry but i decided to just go to bed! I woke up this morning feeling great. So overall, i think lately i am just not eating enough of what i actually want and i am eating too many diet foods. WHen i eat whole foods i get full faster, dont eat as much and stay full and satisfied.
P.S last night my boyfriend and I broke up, i found out some things about him that he was hiding from me. This also didnt cause me to binge! I actually feel great today like its a new start or something. Hopefully i keep feeling this way.
stay at home mom
Member
Hi Hope: I'm glad to hear you feel like you have fresh start today. At some moments, you might feel mournful for what is over, even though you are satisfied it is over.
It's also great that you learned the lesson about eating the greasier foods-- when you can relax about it, it doesn't take a whole lot to satisfy you. I guess this is why the French and Dutch can enjoy dipping their fries in mayo, eat cheese sandwiches and ice cream, and seem generally trimmer than us north americans.
Take care,
Helen
alannah09
Member
OMGG I definitely agree with that. I get this funny thing when I know I am eating something healthy where I decide that I can eat WAYYY more than a normal portion just because it is diet, which totally defeats the purpose. EX. when I buy low-fat or fat free ice cream..i always eat a much larger bowl than when I buy regular. It just kinda weird. I think I am deifnitely going to think about what you said about the fries. That idea is always sort of in the back of my head, but then I end up ordering the steamed veggies and eating them all...and the rest of the burger haha. I didn't know other people did this! Or I always drink a lot more of a low cal drink than I would of regular. Anyway...I just broke up with my bf too!! good timing! I do feel a lot better and everything was going wrong and he was making me more upset than happy. I of course don't know your situation but I am glad to hear that it feels like a fresh start.
Hope777
Member
8-9-09
Had a great day yesterday eating wise. Stuck to my every three hours. Except at dinner i started thinking about my break up and i totally lost my appetite. This has never really happened before, if anything my hunger usually increases with stress. So i guess you could say i am actually feeling my emotions. Later in the night (about an hour after i would normally eat) i felt physical pain from not eating lol so i decided i would kinda force myself to eat. I was debating weather to have my final snack for the day. I definitely could have gone without it but i really didnt want to get in the routine of not eating enough and it coming back to bite my with a binge lol. I decided to have a little popcorn and hot chocolate, after i finished i kinda wanted more but i decided to just brush my teeth and get ready for bed. I think i still under-ate yesterday because i woke up this morning feeling a little weak and hungry before my run. I had some extra oats and felt better. I am up-taking my calorie intake finally because i truly think i am still under-eating.
jessie09
Member
hey hope777 congrats you're doing well! it's kinda late response but i read about your dad's comments and it reminded me of the comments i've been getting so you're not alone. he was simply telling me that he met an old friend who claimed to have taught me at school before, and that friend described 'me' as "tanned, slim, long hair with fringe" and so my dad said he replied, "slim? i think you got the wrong person." (OUCH!!) he then went on to describe that old friend to me, asking me if that was indeed my former teacher.
he didn't even notice how hurt i was about the comment at all.
i guess it's up to us to take these comments lightly. even if they were true...we're still here to battle this disorder and that's what matters...
Hope777
Member
Good day. Stuck to eating every three hours. My last meal i wanted more but knew my tummy was satisfied so i was able to stop. I had some calories left over but i had a massive headache and just ended up going to bed. I woke up this morning feeling really weak and hungry. I kind of felt this way yesterday too. Anyways i had a bigger breakfast than normal around 450 calories (normally around 250 to 300). I feel a bit better now, but not really sure why i am feeling so weak these last two days. I could hardly finish my workout yesterday.
Hope777
Member
normal day. Raised my calorie intake for the day bc i was feeling so weak, but i feel better today so it worked. I think i might start alternating my calories to 2000 somedays and 1850 on others. I try on my bridesmaid dress today that i ordered 2 months ago, i am hoping it will fit a little looser. Went out with my friends last night. Only had one drink and when they all went to chow down i wasnt even hungry and didnt eat anything :). yay.
alannah09
Member
yay! It sounds like your doing really well. and I have heard alternating is GREAT for your metabolism because it never knows what the hell is going on so it always stays ready for the higher number of calories...weird question..you said a lot of your friends have/have had EDs of some kind..do they still haev them/do you guys talk about them? and do you usually open up? Like I know my BEST friends like the best 3 in a larger group know but I just felt weird sharing them with the others..even when they are talking about it. I dunno...just wondered what you thought. I feel like once people know you have/have had an ED they are always super weird with you around food. Maybe im crazy..just wondered what you thought
Hope777
Member
Hey Alannah,
I have only opened up to two of my friends about my own personal eating disorder. It was about 3 years ago, i think we were complaining about how fat we were and she asked me if i have ever tried to throw up after i ate. We were a little intoxicated and i ended up telling her everything. IT turned out that she had the same problem! I was so surprised bc i thought i was the only one. Later I then i ended up telling one of my other good friends. We used to talk about it but not really too much. I would ask her if she still had the "problem" (as we would call it). I think she was a little worse off than me. We never really bring it up anymore and i think it might be a little awkward to talk about it so i just dont bring it up. I try to stay off the topic of my weight at all costs. All my friends just think i am really healthy bc i eat healthy and exercise alot but none of them know about my binge eating. However, i can defiantly tell that my other 3 friends who had the disorder emotionally eat sometimes and sometimes binge. I can just tell by the way they act and eat and call themselves fat. I dont really feel comfortable bringing it up to them so i dont say anything about it. I totally know what you mean about once they know you have a eating disorder being weird around food. I felt this way around my other friend i told about my eating disorder. Now enough time had passed that everyone just thinks im normal. Anyways, i probably wouldn't talk about this to my friends-or family bc i feel like it would be super awkward around food. But i guess if you feel really close to someone you may be able to talk to them about it, but i just dont think i am the type of person who can haha. Hope this kinda helps!
alannah09
Member
yeah..It actually does in some ways. My binging was eventually so bad and so obvious that my family knows because they are the ones who suggested I get help! (interventionnnnn how embarrassing) although I am glad they did it. I guess I am just worried about next year. There were a lot of med. forms to fill out that my xc coaches will see. In the beginning..I decided I would just lie, and I always marked no when it asked about EDs, but then when my doc. filled out my health history she wrote some stuff about anorexia and binge eating (UGH!) so I will probably have some explaining to do to my coaches when I get to campus, and I still can't decide if I want to try and say my doc. is an idiot or just tell them the truth and maybe get a psychologist or nutritionist on campus...i dont know what to do!
icecreamjunkie
Member
i also have been trying to decide to tell friends. part of me thinks it would be helpful b/c then they would know why i withdraw from things, and why i dont ever want to go out to eat or anything like that. but the people i have told hasnt been helpful to me at all, i told 2 people in my family and we always just end up fighting when we talk about it, and the friends that ive sorta mentioned my overeating with have just been like yeah thats not good and then havent really said anything at all that helps...the most support i have gotten has come from coming here. i have been trying to decide if i should go to a therapist but id rather beat this on my own, but am pretty sick of trying!
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