Tips to stop binge eating, stop overeating, stop emotional eating, stop eating fast food, stop eating junk food
July 30, 2012 at 6:04 pm #94005
Hey, at least your 3.5 mile run turned into a way longer run Even if it was under unpleasant circumstances. It was an adventure! Sort of. At least it probably won’t happen again!
AWESOME! 8th day, WHOA. You’re so lucky that you love running! That’s really great:) And good job on the snacking. You were probably hungry because your run ended up being so long and drawn-out!July 30, 2012 at 6:06 pm #94006July 30, 2012 at 9:24 pm #94007
Yes, I hope I won’t do that again. I think it would actually be sensible if I were to walk each ‘route’ before I run it. It is easy to work out a park or something like that, but when streets etc. are involved I think I need to work out where I’m going.
1. I had a panini w/ mozzarella and tomato for lunch. I only ate one half of the bread bit of the panini. I didn’t really enjoy this. I don’t really like the bread. I think it is because it is white flour or something, so it is so sticky. I didn’t really want it. I never know what to choose when I have free lunch because I’m supposed to choose myself (so, like I would have to do at many cafes and places). But, I just don’t know what I am supposed to choose, so then I just ask the person to make up anything, or I just had this panini because I had it before but I didn’t even ask for it directly so it was very confusing. I need to improve this. It is just annoying for the server as well, I think. I would prefer to make a salad b/c I never have any of that food in my room, but then you have to pick all the ingredients yourself and that is confusing.
2. A person offered me and the co-worker I was sat with some donuts. We both took one. I had a bite of this, but it was obvious that the person I was with was not going to eat it. So I didn’t either. I didn’t really want it so that was fine (it was very sticky). But, it is awkward because I also knew I couldn’t eat it – because neither she nor my boss would.
3. I went to hall for dinner, but the food was not very nice. I had, macaroni cheese, green beans and potato wedges. The mac cheese was not nice at all, so I just ate the burnt cheese (altho it still tasted not-nice, I like burnt things). I ate all the green beans because I have no access to vegetables. I ate some potato wedges but they tasted quite crap. I don’t know why?!
4. So, then when I was back in my room, I started to get a migraine. This was annoying. I took something for that, and then I ate an apple (that I got from hall) and a slice of bread w/ cheese. So that is fine.
5. My head still feels bad for some reason. Also, I am … so … itchy!! I can’t stop scratching! I am hoping this is psychological. It is probably psychological. I just looked it up and apparently this is a side-effect of withdrawal, so maybe it is just that and it will go away. But it is quite horrible to be this itchy! It began only on my head because I remember wondering whether I had somehow caught headlice or something. But now it is just all overrrrrrrrrrr, woe, woe but oh well, probably need to distract myself.July 31, 2012 at 8:07 pm #94008
1. This morning, I went to the 2 mile place and did that. Then I was walking back, and I decided to do the 1 mile place too. But, as I was walking there, I was overwhelmed with the feeling that I didn’t want to do it!! Every time someone nosed towards the gates, I would think, well they’re going in there so I can’t go in there. But, I decided this was a situation where I might force myself, so I did it anyway even though I thought I’d probably give up. And: I made it around the whole thing easily, and I didn’t encounter anybody. Therefore, FU doubting-self. It doesn’t really count o as 3 miles because I walked in-between the two places. One thing I would have liked to have done, is to just run home! After I finished the 2nd place, I know I could have kept running but as soon I go through the gate I stop abruptly – as if anyone cares whether I run or not!
2. I ate half a slice of bread w/ PB before going, the other half w/ PB and a banana after, then I had a yogurt cause I was quite hungry.
3. I had a salad for lunch. I just guessed what ingredients. lol. I just had stuff like uhh, mozzarella, tuna, coleslaw etc.
4. I went to hall for dinner. I had some weird thing in sauce (chickpeas and vegetables I think), and peas, and cauliflower. I also had an apple.
5. The porter today asked whether I was going to do any more baking, and then told my coworkers how great a cook I am etc etc. This was quite awkward!! Because I hadn’t thought of making anything. So I bought some chocolate chips (I usually buy chocolate bars, and cut them all up, but then end up picking a lot while cutting). This was more expensive but more sensible. So I mixed them up and I am leaving them in the fridge overnight. I ate some of the dough. I was a bit worried because I got a bit ‘into’ picking out the chips. But anyway, that was fine, I think it would have been a bit unnatural if I hadn’t eaten any of the dough! Because cookie dough is nice. So I will bake them in the morning and give them to the porters.
6. I think I am quite happy! It’s so strange. Sometimes when I am sat outside, and I look around, I feel so lucky to be here! I also today, had to hang out with one of my coworkers for about an hour. I was worried about this because we were expected to ‘hang out’ but I was thinking – there is no audio on these computers, how will we keep talking for an hour!! But I found I could ask her loads of questions and then the situation ended quite naturally after the hour and we went back to work.August 1, 2012 at 7:05 am #94009
Baking the cookies now. I started picking out chocolate chips again and I was like … FFS, considering I was baking them and all and I was picking some out of every cookie ball. So then I just ate a cookie instead and … it was so good! I know how to make plump cookies now, it’s epic! OK, so that was nice. Other than that, I’ve only eaten half a slice of bread w/ PB this morning because I thought I might go for a run.
I haven’t been this morning because I need to bake all these cookies and I’m a bit worried for a meeting with my tutor this morning!! Because before that, I have a volunteer meeting so I’ll just have to straight from that to my tutor. So I’m going to read up on stuff now. I’m a bit worried about all this! Sad that I have not gone for a run. I feel I need to finish baking the cookies first, b/c I want to turn the fridge and freezer off. Maybe after that, I will have time to go for a run? Otherwise I will have to leave it for today. (It’s 8 AM, so it’s getting a bit late).August 1, 2012 at 8:11 pm #94010
Baddish day, but it could have been worse.
1. I went to the volunteer thing. It was OK.
2. I went to meet my tutor. I don’t know why but it really upset me. I got really preoccupied with how gross, disgusting, dirty he made me feel. That is more the way I act than him. I decided to delete what else was here, because otherwise I will regret writing such an openly pathetic post after.
4. I ate when I got back. I overate (1 slice of bread w/ cheese and tomato, another slice of bread (buttered), 1/2 tin baked beans – I think. Edit: Also, I went to the kitchen cause I remember I threw a broken biscuit out – that was lame). I got more and more upset as time went on. I didn’t eat any more just cuz, I kind of ate the other stuff deliberately even though it did not taste good (the baked beans were old and the bread is stale and the biscuit had been in the bin obv, lol), I don’t know and then I didn’t want any more. It is really childish but then after a while I was just crying and hitting my chair. Then when I was outside (because I thought that’d help me calm down etc), I just got really obsessed with brushing imaginary things off my clothes I don’t know, it was totally absurd but I wouldn’t stop doing it!!
5. So, anyway, a while after that I decided I’d just give up and stick with the course I’m on. So I went to go ask this person for reading recommendations, and she is so nice, and she started talking about the reading and she had so much interest in it. Anyway, she was so nice, I don’t know she was so friendly, then I decided doing this course wouldn’t be so bad.
6. I was kind of sad to leave her when she finished working and we reached where I live, then when I got back I ate again uh … I ate broccoli, a slice of bread with PB and 125g of mozzarella (a packet). So, now my stomach hurts. I know I overate today. I think it could have been worse though, like after that I was going to go to the library to get the books she recommended but I went to the supermarket and stood looking around for something to pick. But, I was reaching in my pocket to see if I had 50 p (biscuits) but, I decided I didn’t want to do that – why would I fuck myself over after I’ve made it so many days. So I didn’t do that. So I overate but I am not upset about my eating today.
7. It worries me a bit that I’ve switched so suddenly on courses just because that girl was nice to me. It’s not like if I read the same books, I will love them as much as she evidently does. I don’t know. It strikes me as very pathetic. I don’t know though. I don’t think I can switch course, because I just want everybody’s reassurance. I can’t make the decision by myself. The tutor couldn’t tell me how much or what I’d need to read either so I don’t feel I can even try to make it.
9. So, today = bad day, but it [eating] could have been worse as I say. I don’t know why I overeat on days when I don’t run. It doesn’t make a lot of sense. I will run tomorrow!And I will feel so much better doing that, I know. I overreacted to the tutor situation. It is very, very pathetic. I am getting rashes now, from all the scratching without realising. This is also a bit annoying. but I don’t know what to do about that. I hope the itchiness will go away soon.
I guess I am just a bit sad because even though I will stick with this course now, what I really want is to tell people about that decision, so they will think I’m a positive person who has made a decision and they’ll think it’s a good idea. I just mean if that girl today had been talking about the other course, I would have ‘chosen’ that. That’s lame. I wish I would make a decision by myself and not be so easily influenced. This doesn’t even count as a decision really. It’s basically just me trying to cover the fact I am not making one (by not making a decision about the other course, I stay on this one by default).
but oh well. I will:
1. Run tomorrow
2. Eat properly again (I know I will. I’m not entirely sure why I did that today).
3. Do some reading
I feel a bit crap. I got the books out but I can’t read for some reason (follow the words). I guess I am tired. It bothers me that I am responding so extremely, because now I just wish I wasn’t at university and that I didn’t have to see any of these people again. This is ridiculous. I am just going to watch some of a film and then go to bed, and hopefully I will feel better about it all tomorrow. It bothers me also, that I was going to buy one book she said I’d need, but then I am worried it might be a waste of money – what am I talking about, if I’ve decided to this course after all. So I should just buy it and move on. God.August 2, 2012 at 2:39 pm #94011
1. I went for a run this morning, at a different park I had not been to befoer. I think it was 2 miles. I need to find a larger park!! I know I can run more.
2. I’ve actually done a ton of walking today, because after that I went to go buy some bread, then I left to TRY to find some clothes … that was just an age ago, like four hours. I must have have been walking srsly slow. I get really stressed out in clothes shops though, because they are very noisy and confusing.
3. Anyway uh, today I ate:
a. Half a slice of (stale) bread w/ PB before run
b. One slice of (fresh) bread w/ PB and banana after run
c. An apple when in town
d. I was going to make an omelette, but I accidentally opened a can of tomato pesto and then it turned out that WOW tomato pesto is SO NICE. So I don’t know … I’ve kind of just eaten a crust of bread with pesto and cheese. Man, pesto is just ridic good though.
e. So I might make an omelette for dinner. I might have a yogurt if I get hungry before then.August 3, 2012 at 6:30 pm #94012
1. I ate a slice of bread w/ PB for breakfast and an apple. (I think).
2. I ate a salad for lunch, w/ tuna, coleslaw, uhh … egg, sweetcorn, carrot. I didn’t eat most of the coleslaw, cause they hardly gave me any tuna, woe, and coleslaw is not nice without tuna.
3. I ate a yogurt for a snack.
4. I went to hall for food, but it was pasta and it was really bad (it just tasted like pasta with a watery tin of tomatoes over it). So, I just ate a couple of potato wedges w/ the vegetables they gave me.
5. On ym way back, I checked in the supermarket and they had cheesecake and a vegetable pot meal reduced so I got both. I got the cheesecake – I don’t know why. I just really liked cheesecake when I was younger and I thought I could probably do portion control now – like, just have a regular slice.
6. Unfortunately, the cheesecake wasn’t that nice at all so I didn’t want it. But then, it had this lemon sauce stuff swirled through it, which was quite nice, my mistake was trying to pick all this out – cause if you ate the cheesecake next to it, it tasted kind of OK. I ended up picking it all apart. I weighed what was left and I picked about 120g, which works out as a bit more than one slice anyway – so WTF.
7. This was annoying, but whatever. I thought, well, that’s not too bad, I accept it, but then I just threw it up, I don’t know, this annoys me a bit because that was all VERY pointless, because, 1. cheesecake wasn’t nice, 2. why did i throw it up when i knew i’d only technically eaten a bit more than 1 slice, 3. I think it’s mostly annoying cause I didn’t think when I was in the shop. I kind of wanted to pick earlier but I didn’t, but then when I was just in there and saw the stuff reduced I didn’t think about picking at all. I just thought I’d eat a slice just cause I haven’t had cheesecake in ages and it was really cheap. Well, that’s disappointing, but obviously just going to move on from this.
8. I think I might need to schedule ‘nice’ food into eating, but I don’t know what’s nice and not expensive. -_- I have yogurt but I don’t really like it, lol. I say this cause last night, I kind of wanted something sweet but all there was was an apple, so I ate that but then I also ended up eating a slice of bread w/ PB even though I didn’t really want it (basically cause I didn’t have anything else to eat). (I wasn’t bothered about this cause I did so much walking yesterday).
So, that was not good. But, it could be worse. I will just move on. Also, I didn’t run today which may have something to do with this. It is just that I slept so crappily and then I thought it might make even more tired later in the day if I ran.
I hope I will sleep properly tonight and I will run tomorrow and I will eat properly.
Edit: I think the reasons I picked today are this. 1. I was probably hungry, because I know between lunch and dinner I got hungry and this does not usually happen. Then I did not like the food in hall so I didn’t eat a lot. 2. This is probably why I tried to eat the cheesecake even though it was not nice. What I should have done is eaten the rest of ‘dinner’ first, then tried the cheesecake. Then if I didn’t like it I could have just thrown it out. 3. I think I threw it up because when I was picking it was totally mindless and so even if it is the same in grams, it is still not the same as eating just a slice of cheesecake. I think when you pick, it is not eating at all because it is just all in fragments and scrapings. So it is not like eating. I associate picking with purging.
4. I didn’t really have a good day, because I was tired and at work I didn’t do anything or speak to anyone because I had the boring job. So, it was a long day.
5. All in all, I am disappointed because previously in the shop I have thought about buying things, but then realised I did not want to eat them but to pick them. I should have realised this was potentially a bad situation, esp. when the first thing I did when I came in is open the cheesecake.
6. If I had eaten enough, I think I would have accepted that the cheesecake wasn’t very nice and left it. (Ideally I wouldn’t have bought it. The question is, why did I go in to the shop in the first place. I had no reason to go in.) I just ate a cheese and pesto w/ a slice of bread and now I feel full. That is fine.
7. I didn’t pay attention. I didn’t think about it at all. I think I was just on auto-pilot and that’s why I picked. It is OK though, because it is only a slip-up. I think food like that is only nice when it is enjoyed or shared with other people. Even when I bought it, I wondered WTF I would do with it when I had had a slice.
8. I think when I made the cookies, I should have allowed myself to keep one or two instead of giving all 48 to the people. That would have been perfectly acceptable I think. I mean b/c then I would have had something small and ‘nice’ to eat.August 4, 2012 at 1:39 pm #94013
1. I ate quarter of a slice of bread w/ PB before going for a run.
2. I did 2 laps of one of the larger parks … I don’t know how many miles that is cuz I can’t find the info online. I was running for 30 minutes though. It was good. I need to make doing that, really easy. I have volunteer induction tomrorow but hopefully I will go before.
3. I ate the rest of the slice of bread w/ PB and banana when I got back. It was nice.
4. I later ate two tomatoes w/ a bit of cheese and … tomato pesto for a snack.
5. I ate one of those ‘Innocent’ vegetable pot things for lunch, that I got because it was reduced. It was way spicy, ahhh, but it was OK.
6. I will probably have an omelette for dinner but I need to find other things I can make really. Or I could have an egg w/ beans and a slice of toast. Ehh. I do also have couscous but let’s not get too complicated. I will just do something with an egg.
7. Must run 5 milessssssss
I feel quite hungry right now, which is rather disturbing because I know that pot had quite a number of calories in it (like 350 – 400). Therefore, I don’t understand why I would be hungry. But that is fine. It is probably because I am trying to make notes right now and I don’t have a clue how to make notes so I am looking for an excuse. It is so difficult. I am just going back through the cantos I have read and trying to make notes but what do notes consist of, no idea. Anyway! wutev I guess.August 5, 2012 at 8:46 am #94014
1. Last night, I had an omelette w/ beans instead because I don’t know. Anyway, I think possibly I will need to shift meals around, so I either eat a larger breakfast or a larger lunch. Cuz I’m trying to go to bed and wake up early, it is quite senseless to eat my biggest meal last, because I was quite hungry yesterday for some reason (I thought I was maybe trying to procrastinate but when I ate I realised I was actually hungry). It is a bit confusing without calorie-counting cause then I don’t know whether I’ve eaten enough or not. But anyway I felt better after eating dinner but it would have been good if I’d just eaten something like that for lunch instead cuz as it was it meant I wasn’t really productive until after dinner.
2. I didn’t go for a run this morning because I wanted to read instead before the volunteering thing. It is tipping it down with rain now so I don’t know if I’ll go later. I need to do more reading really. Way more reading.
3. I ate a banana w/ PB for breakfast (bread has gone mouldy AGAIN, god). I’ll probably buy some food after volunteering if shops are open, aaand … I’ll maybe have an omelette w/ beans for lunch and see how that goes (if less hungry, and to finish off the beans since I’m working tomorrow. Do srsly need to find new things to make though! / Get some ingredients). The freezer is OK now so I can buy vegetables.
4. Then I’ll probably have a toastie for dinner cuz I need some of that pesto yeaaaah.
OK so, s’all good.August 6, 2012 at 8:20 am #94015
1. The volunteering thing was cool. The manager seems like such a fun person!! So I am looking forward to doing that.
2. But, I was there for ages, so couldn’t eat lunch. After, I went to Tesco and got some veg, bread etc. I also bought a single white chocolate and cranberry cookie they had, cause I thought it’d be interesting to try.
3. What was annoying about this, is that the cookie was not very nice at all. It is completely beyond me, but then I started picking out the white chocolate and cranberries. The white chocolate was at least nice. But, I guess because I was hungry (it was like 4 pm and I hadn’t eaten since 8 ) I picked the rest too, even though the cookie dough was just gluey and gross. Don’t mean to boast obv because I am just following a recipe, but homemade cookies are so much better. Anyway, I was a bit annoyed w/ that because I’m basically just picking to eat something I don’t like. lol. Bizarre. I was fine with eating it though.
4. IBS runs in my family so my stomach didn’t appeciate going so long without food. (bloated). I had a slice of bread w/ cheese and pesto, then an omelette w/ beans later on for dinner.
5. My neighbour asked me to do something I didn’t want to do by text, and also bizarrely is that I just went to the kitchen and started picking at stale cornflakes. That was also a bit annoying! I eventually stopped myself and just texted back to say I couldn’t do it. I think I also at some point ate half a slice of bread w/ butter, so then I think this was a difficult day. For some reason I did pick quite a bit but it’s OK. I am annoyed about the cornflake thing though, because that was a totally irrational response. I was just a bit annoyed that she was asking me to do it to be honest.
1. I went for a run. I found it really difficult to do the 2 laps today so I did like, 1.75 or so (took a different route through the park).
2. I ate half a slice of breade (left over from yesterday) w/ PB before, but I did start picking at the (crunchy) peanut butter, which was again quite WTF. I really didn’t want to go for a run for some reason so I was putting it off. Anyway, I did and I’m glad I did so whatever.
3. I ate a slice of bread w/ PB and a banana when I just got back.
4. I am going to read today!!! (Turns out I have a day off work). So, I’ll probably have an omelette later lololol because they are just really nice, and then vegetables and couscous for the other meal.
5. EndAugust 7, 2012 at 4:56 pm #94016
I ate OK yesterday. I had couscous w/ vegetables and a Quorn burger for dinner.
I mixed up some cranberry and white chocolate cookies to give to some people here. I went to bake them this morning. I picked a bit at the dough, but anyway then I let myself have a cookie when I’d made them. I ate 1/2 banana (the rest was bruised) w/ 1/2 a slice of bread (from yesterday) before I ate any cookie, because I thought otherwise it might be a bad idea. I had chosen the smallest one so I ended up having another.
That was OK. I baked the rest and wrapped them up, but then two of them broke! This upset me a bit because I didn’t think I could give them to anyone if they had broken in half, so I ended up picking the cranberries and white chocolate out of them – but then I picked the rest too, so in total I ate four cookies. I think I started to pick to avoid eating another whole cookie, but kept picking cause they tasted good. Meh. I stopped after that. So that was not good really, but it could have been worse.
I ate a salad for lunch (coleslaw, tuna, tomato… something) and will go to hall for dinner. I know this morning was not good. But, it was OK. I am not bothered about it. Because I have been working, I just had to get back on track. I think if I had been in my room I might have made it worse, so that was lucky!
It is a new thing for me to let myself eat a ‘whole’ portion of something I’d made. I know I resorted to picking for the last 2, but for the first 2 I just ate them normally and enjoyed them. I was happy with only eating 2, but I don’t know, I just got worried when the other 2 broke!! I don’t know whether you can give broken cookies to people – maybe I should have just thrown them out.
That is all.August 8, 2012 at 2:24 pm #94017
I never bake because I just can’t seem to control myself. One cookie turns into, like, six without me even realizing it! And then there’s all the snacking that can potentially (and does) happen while I’m baking – like chocolate chips, or whoops! just ate the equivalent of a small bowl of cookie dough!
That’s not even getting to cakes. I guess I do sort of pick at them…have a normal slice, and then proceed to cut off a bunch of really tiny slices, each one being “just a taste” and “the last one”, until 1/3 of the cake is gone.
Basically, through all that, I meant to say that I admire your ability to bake with out completely losing it
I also understand where you’re coming from about that cheesecake. Although, actually, I don’t think you should be annoyed with yourself for buying it! You said it was irritating cause before when you were in the store, you considered buying stuff to pick at, but then didn’t, but then when you were in again and saw the cheesecake, picking didn’t even occur to you and you bought it.
That’s great! It’s huge that you bought it without the intention of picking at it! Just to have a slice! It probably would have all worked out perfectly if the cheesecake had, in fact, been any good, so don’t be so tough on yourself about that!
I probably would have done something like that, too – trying it, realizing it wasn’t that great, and then picking around it for no reason, other than that I had no idea what to do with it now that I didn’t like it.
I still haven’t figured out to do when I decide I want something, am going to let myself have it, and then realize it’s not worth it. Usually, I just eat it anyway. It usually happens when I’m out with people, and they’re like “Have a COOKIE!” and I go “ok, I deserve this….sure, why not?” and then I try it, it’s TOTALLY not worth it, and I’m so mad and disappointed I just eat it anyway.
But, seriously, I think you should view the cheesecake incident as progress, simply because you bought it with wonderful intentions, and even though the plan went wrong, you didn’t end up picking out half the cake. That’s really good!
I don’t know about scheduling treats. Maybe find something that’s really good and then stick to it whenever you decide you want something like that? Like your cookies you made. Maybe when you decide you want a treat, make some, give them away (broken and all – seriously, there’s nothing wrong with broken cookies, I promise, people eat them anyway! ) and keep a few for yourself and have them! Whatever you decide works for you!
I can’t remember what happened, maybe it was the cheesecake thing, or the bad session with the tutor, but you were sounding really positive and happy You’ve made a world of progress! It’s a success just to feel like that once, and it means that you can feel like that again.
And as for not running one day and then overeating, I do the same thing, too. It’s perfectly normal. Exercise just makes people feel good and like they’re on the right track, so they eat like it, too. And then when they don’t, it’s like “blehhh whatever.”
So, quester, lots of good things happening! Keep working at it, cause you’re succeeding a lot already!August 8, 2012 at 9:57 pm #94018
Yes, I was a lot like that when I baked at home, but now I find it easier for some reason. I find cooking for people here now way less stressful. When I first started, I picked a lot, because I would always get crazy upset because I was worried they wouldn’t like it or I’d done something wrong etc etc. So, I would kind of keep picking because I wanted to keep checking that it tasted OK etc. but then I’d never allow myself e.g. a proper slice or a whole cookie so I’d never in fact know that it tasted OK and so it’d be a self-defeating cycle. However, now it doesn’t really bother me because I am used to it! I really like baking for other people now. It is nice. And becasue I think it is OK to have some dough or eat some of whatever I made, I don’t need to pick then either. That said I think if I wasn’t giving it all away then I would have more difficulty (at home I was baking just for my parent so it was very different. Now I give it away and I never have to see it again.)
Yes, you’re right about the cheesecake. I decided I am going to make some cheesecake instead. I think it is cool to try new foods. I really want to get more into cooking as well, because right now I mostly just bake. I would like to make lasagne or something. I am ambivalent about this because I would be cooking just for myself, so I would have to work out how to divide it into portions etc. and stick to it. This will be difficult, but I think it would be a good thing too.
I don’t think I really need to schedule treats after all … I think it is just sometimes I want something with sugar and I don’t know what to have. I wish I could have dried figs because they are so delicious, but I always end up eating the whole packet – always, they are just so nice – and last time I did that it made me very ill for some reason. I should buy more yogurts! That is what I should do. I ran out. Yes, foods are often so disappointing though. I feel like that when I go to the supermarket, cuz before I’d go and think ‘k, I’ll buy myself some junk food as a test / treat’ but then I’d wander around and not want any of it. which sucks! I think a lot of food was only nice cause I was picking at it!
Thanks snarfblat, you’re great. I do feel way better lately. A couple of people have commented on how I seem to be more confident and less stressed out now, which is nice too. I even met that tutor again and it turns out he is actually quite friendly; I was just having my usual omg-meeting-new-person-why-does-everyone-hate-me moment. lol. But yes, it is all good.
1. I ate OK for the rest of the day. I went to hall and had broccoli, carrots, uh, and ugh … salmon. Also, I think I had three potatoes. It was OK. I only ate about half of the salmon. I did have one or two slices of bread when I got back to my room though. I am not entirely sure why. O well.
2. I went for a run this morning uhh. I didn’t eat before going, but when I got back I had 1. a slice of bread, 2. a banana, 3. a tomato (…I don’t know. I wanted to go to the library and was paranoid about getting hungry so I ate the tomato before I left).
3. I ate a slice of toast w/ beans and an egg for lunch. I ate an apple for a snack. I ate … couscous, a Quorn burger thing, and vegetables for dinner. Later, I had another apple.
4. That is all. It was good.August 9, 2012 at 8:03 am #94019
I went out this morning to go for a run. But, the first park was having construction done and the way was closed off – I have a feeling I could have gone through if I had asked but I just walked past and went to go to the second park. The second park had a sign saying, ‘Closed’. So, I went to the third park. I was walking for about 30 minutes before I got to start running! I was quite annoyed at myself because I could have been running between the parks (e.g. the walk from 2nd to 3rd is 15 minutes). I did a lap around this. I didn’t want to do a second lap even though I think I was just being lazy.
But then, I was just walking out when I thought I’d run back. And I did run back and it was AWESOME. I felt so fast haha, even though that is only in contrast to pedestrians. It was amazing. I loved it!! I stopped when I made the last turn because it was nearing 9 o’clock and – thought I might meet someone from college, also I know they say you should ‘cool down’ after running so a final walk is good (that was just my rationalisation really).
So that is cool. I hope I’ll be able to try out the running routes that involve streets now (because a lot of people run on the streets here). It is more interesting than doing the same parks over and over.
I’m going to eat a slice of bread w/ banana now and then I am working so free food. That run was the best. I hope I will try to make myself wear a pair of shorts or something soon though – or just cooler clothes. I am running in a large t-shirt and loose joggers right now and today I felt the heat quite a bit. But it’s fine.
It is also cool because I am not really worried about eating any more. I know I am going to feed myself an appropriate amount so it is fine. I haven’t thought about picking in ages. It’s all going quite well right now.
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