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Binge Eating Forum » Recent Topics http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ Support to stop binge eating, stop emotional eating, and stop overeating. en Thu, 17 May 2012 19:37:24 +0000 LiftedUp on "Ho'oponopono is Keeping me Binge Free" http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hooponopono-is-keeping-me-binge-free#post-127474 Wed, 04 Apr 2012 11:47:46 +0000 LiftedUp 127474@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ As we get older, we get even MORE stuck in bad habits. I've struggled for DECADES with binge eating, and many times felt like I was sub-human, very ashamed, and sad that I have stripped myself of many of life's joys because of overweight and feeling ill, sick or bloated. As with many overeaters, I vacillate back and forth with a super clean diet of green juices or just organic fruits and veggies ... and then binge episodes. Life was hell. I did so much work on myself, and yet the demon of bingeing still tormented me. In many ways it has ruined my life because of pushing others away, the inability to have relationships, low self esteem, and this has affected me on every level, including financially. BUT HERE IS THE GOOD NEWS! About 5 years ago I heard about an ancient Hawaiian (Huna) practice called Ho'oponopono that has magical abilities. You can read about the history and the practice <a href="http://higherpath.wordpress.com/2008/04/18/day-49-do-you-hooponopono/">here at this blog.</a> This is how it works: If you had a silicon memory computer chip that you wanted to erase, you can expose it to ultraviolet light and it will instantly be back to its pristine, original clean state again. Our mind is like a computer, and the binge program can be considered a bad (buggy) program that needs to be erased or debugged. Ho'oponopono does the job, but only if it is done correctly, as I discovered. When I first heard about it, stupidly, my ego said "this will never work" so I only gave it a half-hearted try and got zero results. About six months ago I started using it more, and tied it to an activity I did everyday, for me this was walking my dog. I would address the deep unhappiness I felt and that I wanted to be thin ... but still no results. And then, about 1 month ago I felt I had reached my bottom, and I guess I finally broke through to use it the way the magic works. For every bite I put in my mouth that was not in my highest good, I would (during my walk) say, with full feeling, truly sorry, with my heart opened wide and my humility at its peak: [For example ... as my words change daily.] "Beloved Creator (Father/Mother God) I am so sorry that I have binged, and stuffed my feelings down, and used food to distract me, or to not feel, or to avoid what I need to be doing, or to make excuses for myself, or to hurt this precious body you have given me ..." [You are telling Creator / Source / The Universe what the 'bug' is in your software that is auto-executing a program full of errors ... the binge eating.] "Please forgive me." [You are asking Creator / Source / The Universe to 'erase' this record and this habit.] "Thank you." [You are receiving the light that cleans the old 'buggy' program and accepting a new, clean program that is free of any binges.] "I love you." [You are connecting with Creator / Source / The Universe and allowing the love energy of your connection to keep you in alignment with the new program.] - - - So, this started working for me when I started saying it many times a day, and really meaning it with full heart. Just intellectually knowing it with my mind did nothing for me. So I want to share that there is hope, it is free, and you can direct the energy of shame and regret into something positive rather than just beating up on your self. I feel normal again, and I am going to continue using it every day, and look forward to being binge free permanently for the rest of my life. This program is called "cleaning" and it is so easy to do, especially when you piggy-back it with something you do daily, such as driving to work or walking the dog. I shared this to bring hope to those of you who feel hopeless. God bless you. If it works for me (who felt hopeless) I know it will work for you if you clean with full heart. Cri on "loneliness" http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/loneliness-1#post-130358 Thu, 17 May 2012 14:18:25 +0000 Cri 130358@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ Hi, I'm new in this forum. I don't really know how to start... Today has been one of my bad days. I'm home alone and I feel so sad and lonely. I would like to call a friend but nobody unserstands what I feel. They'd just say:"don't worry, we all eat too much sometimes". But that's not the same thing. Do you think that keeping a journal really helps?? I'm seeing a therapist, but it feels like I'm getting nowhere... . Anyway, I'm 28 and I have been binge eating since I was 17. I'm really fed up with this life! quester on "journalo" http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/journalo#post-129761 Fri, 04 May 2012 15:25:36 +0000 quester 129761@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ i am going to start a journal. um. well. i want to eat normally. i am incredibly short so my range should be 1,200 - 1,500. i have trouble with everything related to food. i wanted to stop picking at food and also purging since i returned to university and i made it quite a while. i was eating 1,200. but then i started going lower and lower. and today i was going to get back on track. with 1,200 - 1,500. unfortunately i have now lost count i ate such an absurd amount. i feel sick and disgusting. i am not going to purge. because i try not to purge non-junk food. and basically what i last ate was some reduced vegetable dinner things... i mean i don't even know... anyway i am really pissed off at myself because this was supposed to be my first day eating normally ... again ... and instead it has been the day of my first major binge since being at university. i mean i haven't binged like that in ages. so that's really great. i am getting so anxious leaving my room lately and i shouldn't have left my room today. the person i talked to made me really paranoid and since then it has been downhill with everything. so i'll have to start again tomorrow. again. i thought i'd force myself to leave my room and stay out for an hour. as exposure. unfortunately i now realise this was also a bad idea because i basically just went to a supermarket and brought food back and made everything worse. so that was good. everything is making me anxious. anyway i must eat properly tomorrow. i hope i don't feel this sick tomorrow. i feel really disgusting. i think i also set myself up for a binge because i don't know, i didn't plan the eating properly. anyway this is going to be my attempt at a journal. i didn't really want to start it unless i managed to succeed but i might fail tomorrow and then i'd never start a journal and maybe a journal will be good if i remember to post each day. so. i just planned food for tomorrow and it is at 987 right now but i have a banana to eat as well and it is quite big and i have cheese as well which i haven't added. because i ate a ton of cheese today and i'm not sure i can face any more ... lol ... but i'll work out what to add tomorrow, i might just eat the other half of the tin of kidney beans or something. anyway i lied and did purge some of what i ate. but then someone knocked on my door and wanted to go for a walk. and then i stopped myself and went for a walk with her. that was ok. breakfree on "Maybe a Journal" http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/maybe-a-journal#post-130161 Sat, 12 May 2012 15:03:20 +0000 breakfree 130161@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ I am goign to try this journal thing, but as with many things in my life, I am not able to maintain it over a period of time. One reason I tend to fail at reinventing my relationship with food. So anyway, I haven't any idea where to begin. Have been doing quite badly since my initial post here 5 days ago or so. At night i go through the amounts of food i have eaten, and what I have eaten. Trying to determine how detrimental it is. I eat vastly less than I used to, but more than weight loss seems to need. I used to weight 325 pounds. Now I am somewhere around 240. I stop weighting myself a couple of months ago because I am so frustrated. I haven't lost any weight in months, and it must be because of the amount of food i am eating. The biggest problem for me right now is not feeling full when I eat a normal portion size meal. Why do I have such an abnormal appetite? My disease is very active right now, and I just want to eat all day. Today so far I had 2 toast with 1 egg and egg white for breakfast, was STILL hungry and then had 2 toast with PB. Then I had some whole grain brown rice with sauteed veggies and a bit of chicken breast mixed in for lunch, wasn't enough. I had a slice of bread with a huge dollop of PB on it. Still wanted to eat and eat and eat. I downed 2 scoops of benefiber and water an hour later, which helped, I was so stuffed ( I usually feel that way when taking benefiber). But this week I have been absolutely preoccupied with eating. Chewing lots of gum, I find cinnamon to be most helpful lol. I recognize that I feel very frustrated, lonely and insecure right now. I want to eat so I can be all tired, uncomfortable and have an excuse to feel even worse about myself. Fullfill my own prophecy so I can stop trying and failing.... ya, so that's Saturday. blueeyedbinger on "May 16th 2012. New Summer. New Me." http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/may-16th-2012-new-summer-new-me#post-130312 Wed, 16 May 2012 15:04:49 +0000 blueeyedbinger 130312@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ Hey everyone <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> My name is Alex. I'm 20 years old, almost 21, and I suffer from a binge eating disorder. It wasn't until last summer it started... Last March/April of 2011, I had dropped almost 15-20 pounds....and quickly....honestly I dont know how it happened. As May neared I veered off the weight loss road for about two weeks or so...until I returned home from college for the summer. May 16th 2011 I began my journey. By Mid June I was down 30 pounds from my highest weight of 165 I lived on meal supplement shakes and grilled chicken day in and day out Each day I'd consume 700-800 calories....if I reached nearly 900 I'd feel awfully guilty. I'd wake up each morning around 5am, run a couple miles for 30 minutes, then later on in the day go to the gym for an hour and burn approximately 500-600 calories religiously. Weight fell off. Still unhappy with the way I looked..I became depressed/ Talking to people was a chore for some reason. The only place I felt comfortable was downstairs in my room...alone...with the door shut. I'd talk to no one. People would notice my dramatic weight loss...and I'd clam up. Id feel uncomfortable. I did NOT want to talk about it. I would tell my parents stop talking about it. I dont know why. I wanted to lose more weight. Id gotten into the habit of chewing and spitting at summer barbecues. I craved sugar but denied my body of it. Soon it turned into pretending to eat my dinner at the dinner table. I'd fit as much as i could into my mouth of the grilled chicken, go to the bathroom, spit it into toilet paper and throw it out. Come back, sit down, and repeat once more. Before I knew it, it was my birthday, and I let it go. I went all out. Eating bagels and pizza and cookies....anything I could get my hands on. And thats when it all started. I would diet extremely during the week to make up for the weekend binge...only leading up to another weekend binge...and so on and so forth. It was a vicious cycle. Before I knew it, I had been quickly gaining weight. Weekend in weekend out...i was stuffing my face. I was embarrased. I wouldn't eat in front of people. I was ashamed of myself. So many people had noticed how beautiful I looked after my weight loss...and I let it all go. I was back to fat Alex. Id drive to CVS, buy loads of candy, and eat it...all in one day...making sure I was completely alone. Here I am today....back to my highest weight. 30 pounds heavier than last summer. Each day I wake up kicking myself. It takes every ounce of will power to try to lose weight...I'm just so disappointed in myself. I don't fit into my clothes. I don't feel pretty. I keep telling myself I want to go back to last summer....but I was so miserable...why would I want to go back to that? Well I'm here. Exactly a year ago I started my journey to a better body. Even though I was unhappy...I had the body I wanted....and I intend on doing it again. I know its unhealthy. But I cant stop the way I'm thinking <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_sad.gif" title=":(" class="bb_smilies" /> HELP melmo on "This is it! May 14th!" http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/this-is-it-may-14th#post-130289 Tue, 15 May 2012 18:53:38 +0000 melmo 130289@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ May 14th was my last binge. I am finally done with this habit. Today I have not binged and I am confident I won't ever do it again. I am about halfway through Brain Over Binge. It makes so much sense. I was convinced I was bingeing because of my emotions. I thought that because I was sad, I binged. Or, if I was stressed, I binged. No, I am bingeing because I have the URGE to binge. And I have the urge to binge because I have done it so many times that it's become a habit. It's like smoking. I even said here once that my dr told me I just had to STOP. I was mad, because I thought, if I could just stop, I would! But I can! I just have to ignore the "animal brain" (Which I once read someone refer to like a toddler having a tantrum, so fitting!) and resist. I know I can do it. I remember recently getting so frustrated, because I didn't even know why I binge anymore. I would binge if I was upset or stressed, but also when I was happy, in a good mood and felt good about myself! It made me mad but now that I know WHY I binge....I kind of feel like it'll be easier to stop. Kit1616 on "Guess what - it's another journal!" http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/guess-what-its-another-journal#post-126007 Tue, 13 Mar 2012 13:55:45 +0000 Kit1616 126007@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ Okay, so I was doing so well - about 12 or 13 days binge free, and today I let myself down. I'm feeling a little depressed about it at the moment, as I'm going round my partners parents' for dinner soon, and seeing as I've just binged it's not going to be great, and I'm going to be feeling pretty disgusting! But on the plus side, he certainly knows how to cheer me up and put a smile on my face, so I have that to look forward to <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> Anyway, I felt during the first week of not bingeing it was pretty easy (perhaps because I was busy and out of the house more)...but I've decided to start this journal so that when I have the urge to binge I can direct myself here, instead of to the kitchen. Almost 2 weeks of not bingeing has shown me that I CAN do it, and has motivated me because I know how great it feels to be off the binge. So, tomorrow I'm going to pick up from my 13 (minus 1) days, and will keep writing on here, so that I know there will be the consequence of admitting if I slip up! I've read so many journals which have inspired me and given me ideas too, so I hope that recording my journey on here may be of some use to others also. Please everyone feel free to post on here if you're having a bad/good day, so that we can help each other through this one day at a time. latiifa20 on "Latiifa's Journal" http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/latiifas-journal#post-122466 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 09:08:44 +0000 latiifa20 122466@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ First of all, i'd like to mention im underweight but its not because of diets. i just really like to exercise and i had stopped eating chocolates...so i lost so much weight. now i am a binge eater and i can not control myself at all. i just stuff my self every night long after im full today ill try to stop this my plan is to eat many small portions of food so that i am not hungry at night tinkerbell on "day 7, and struggling want to binge!" http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/day-7-and-struggling-want-to-binge#post-123542 Sun, 08 Jan 2012 18:39:05 +0000 tinkerbell 123542@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ Hi this is my first post on the forum. Im 39 and been a binge eater since I was 13 years old. I have lost many stones, put back on many stones and done dieting of all kinds, counselling, read loads of stop binge eating books you name it I have tried it. I have gone back to what helped me the best- writing a journal healthy eating and trying to exercise. Im day 7 and found today hard always start full of hope <code>this is it never again will I binge</code> then by this amount of days I start thinking no I cant do it. I was on internet and found this site and thought wow there are other people like me, struggling like me. Im so private about my binge eating, I no every trick there is to getting, hiding, removal of evidence and eating food! But I have only ever shared that with my sister. Thank you for reading this xx <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_razz.gif" title=":P" class="bb_smilies" /> hopeful on "Warning - advert for Palladium Private eating disorder retreat on this web-site" http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/warning-advert-for-palladium-private-eating-disorder-retreat-on-this-web-site#post-130297 Wed, 16 May 2012 01:38:40 +0000 hopeful 130297@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ Hi there, Just wanted to warn you that there is an advertisement appearing every time I open the web-site to this forum, for Palladium Private health program for Easting disorders. I don't know how these ads work, whether everyone sees the same things, or whether this is tragetted somehow to people from austrlia. anyway, I totally warn you against this place . Multiple law-suits are ongoing. there charge the earth and do nothing ecept take your money.