http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ Support to stop binge eating, stop emotional eating, and stop overeating. en Sun, 14 Mar 2010 14:43:50 +0000 http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1647 Mon, 12 Jan 2009 17:27:27 +0000 jacquirsw1 1647@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Glad you had a good day.</p> <p>remember it is ok and normal to feel homesick especially when you first return so let yourself feel those feelings, it is ok.</p> <p>Hope today has been as good for you</p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1637 Sun, 11 Jan 2009 12:37:20 +0000 Rainbow 1637@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I did. Felt very thoughtful though.<br /> Now I'm back in the town where I study and I feel a bit homesick.<br /> Think I'm going to study now, maybe that can put my mind at ease.<br /> Ah... I had a good day and ate mostly healthy stuff. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1636 Sun, 11 Jan 2009 10:42:15 +0000 jacquirsw1 1636@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>You are so right, I am glad that you are working these things through and being realistic with yourself.</p> <p>Hope you enjoyed your walk. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1629 Sat, 10 Jan 2009 09:50:14 +0000 Rainbow 1629@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Since my last post everything went ok. I really had no problems with food and ate mostly healthy stuff. I'm still a bit down but I'm trying to work that out without eating. When I felt bad I just took a walk, listened to some music and though about my situation. I realized that I'm eating because I'm feeling empty and bored most of the time, so with this knowledge I'm trying to stop that as it is a bad habit.<br /> Sometimes it's good to show feelings and to let yourself really feel them even though it hurts. I decided that I will not try to numb the pain with food. I'm sure I am going to binge again but I have hope as I know what's wrong with me and that's the first step to being happy again. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1613 Fri, 09 Jan 2009 06:43:54 +0000 jacquirsw1 1613@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I am sooooo glad that you got through that. It was a big thing for you and definitely something for you to remember in the future and be proud of. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1612 Fri, 09 Jan 2009 05:46:09 +0000 Rainbow 1612@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Thank you soooo much! Your words are always so...right...I don't know mybe it sounds stupid but you are very wise.</p> <p>Yesterday I made it (Yay!) I just thought this isn't worth it and went to bed <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_rolleyes.gif" title=":roll:" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1607 Thu, 08 Jan 2009 17:39:24 +0000 jacquirsw1 1607@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Right so you know that this is a big trigger for you.</p> <p>What can you do. </p> <p>You can binge.......... you can give in and let him make you feel vunerable and bad. But do you really want to do that. NO you don't, but you may still do it and if you do that is not the end of the world. When we binge it is often the feelings after the binge that are more distructive than the actual binge. If you haven't managed to keep control (and I know that you can do it even if you haven't this time) then let it go, you have coped with the emotions in the way that you can at the moment. That doesn't mean you have to do that forever.</p> <p>I hope that you have got through this, I really think you are able to but I am also realistic that ability and actually managing it don't always manage to be right at the right time.</p> <p>I hope this made some sense, bit rambly today I know what I want to say but can't seem to write it down properly.</p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1605 Thu, 08 Jan 2009 14:19:02 +0000 Rainbow 1605@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Ok....So till now everything went alright, but I'm having a bit trouble right now as I'm fighting with my boyfriend again...Hope I will get through this </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1603 Thu, 08 Jan 2009 04:38:52 +0000 Rainbow 1603@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hi there!<br /> Thanks for your words!<br /> Well, I have to admit, that I kind of overate but it could have been worse and actually half of it happened in the evening when my parents were home again so I can say that I did ok while I was alone (trying to see the positives :oops:)<br /> Still I thought a bit about my slip and I realized that I stopped doing some things that I know I should do, like not eating in my room or in front of the laptop, so I have to be careful about that...<br /> I also realized that I'm back to thinking black or white cause I overate in the evening thinking: What the hell?! You did it this afternoon why be careful now.<br /> It's really sad to go back to bad habits but at least I noticed, so I am going to fight agains it all over.<br /> This development makes me a bit sad and frightened because i really want to put this disorder behind me but I'm going to try. I'm also down because the day after I overate or binged is always very hard on me as I doubt myself the most then. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1596 Wed, 07 Jan 2009 13:30:49 +0000 jacquirsw1 1596@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Of course you can make it. We know you can, I hope you have.</p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1595 Wed, 07 Jan 2009 09:34:29 +0000 ivierose 1595@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>You will make it, just keep thinking postively! It may sound hard to do right now, but you CAN do it!! Take this alone time to do something positive for yourself ... listen to some music, take a bath, just do something that you will enjoy! You can get through this time by yourself ... and maybe even learn a thing or two about it. If it gets too hard jump on here and write about it! We're all here to support you. And we know that you can do it <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1594 Wed, 07 Jan 2009 07:47:36 +0000 Rainbow 1594@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Waaaaah! I'm alone at home! I'm afraid! I'm afraid! Will I make it???? </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1582 Tue, 06 Jan 2009 06:35:36 +0000 Rainbow 1582@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I have the strong feeling that it has to do with my relationship. We hurt each other way too much and I start to believe that it would be better to break up.<br /> It just seems like all we do is fighting and there is this wall between us....it hurts so much but if we end it then at some point the pain would go away. Now it seems never ending. I really don't know what to do. With my eating disorder I totally isolated myself and I got no real friends left. My boyfriend is the only one who really KNOWS ME. But on the other hand he is also the reason I hurt so terribly and I cry so often. I'm just afraid that he will let me go easily and I will feel that I've made a mistake and then I'll be all alone.<br /> I hate this situation. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1575 Mon, 05 Jan 2009 15:39:35 +0000 jacquirsw1 1575@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Sorry to hear that emotionally it has been difficult today, but that makes the fact that you have had a good food day even more impressive well done. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1573 Mon, 05 Jan 2009 13:42:29 +0000 Rainbow 1573@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Ah I forgot.</p> <p>I had another good day...foodwise...emotionally I nearly had a breakdown but I didn't turn to food...that is a positive. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1572 Mon, 05 Jan 2009 13:41:19 +0000 Rainbow 1572@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Thanks!</p> <p>I'll try to keep doing the things I've learned <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif" title=":D" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1559 Sun, 04 Jan 2009 14:55:57 +0000 jacquirsw1 1559@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>It is understandable that this new phase scares at times. But it is so much better than the old ways.<br /> It does get easier the thing to remember is to keep doing what you learn works even when you think everything is going right, this is where I have fammen down so often as I go for a while without binging and gradually things drop off then some sort of stress will come along and I end up resorting straight back to binging, whereas if I kept doing everything like journalling I would do that to the same extent I don't think.</p> <p>Well done for having another good day.</p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1558 Sun, 04 Jan 2009 13:55:41 +0000 Rainbow 1558@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I know I shouldn't but sometimes it's very hard.<br /> Today I had another good day. It seems to get easier day after day to do the right thing. That's a very strange feeling. I'm so used to binges that I sometimes want to turn back to the routine because I'm afraid of this new development.<br /> I always have to remind myself that I have to stay careful, that I have to keep writing into my journal...things like that. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1550 Sat, 03 Jan 2009 11:55:39 +0000 jacquirsw1 1550@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hey glad to hear you had a good time with the visits.</p> <p>Don't let that feeling get to you.</p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal/page/2#post-1549 Sat, 03 Jan 2009 11:36:13 +0000 Rainbow 1549@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Yesterday and today I had some good days. Yesterday I was out with some friends and today I visited my grandpa. Didn't really struggle with eating.<br /> I'm feeling a bit down though as I have one of my I-don't-like-the way-I-look-phases. Won't let that make me eat though <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1541 Thu, 01 Jan 2009 17:21:58 +0000 Rainbow 1541@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hello and a happy new year to all of you!<br /> I have to admit that I ate way to much yesterday, sort of overate actually but <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_lol.gif" title=":lol:" class="bb_smilies" /> to be honest I really don't mind THAT much. There was so much delicious food and everybody ate a lot so I coudn't withstand. My boyfriend and I ate probably for 4 persons <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_lol.gif" title=":lol:" class="bb_smilies" /> <br /> Well ok, I feel a bit down because of it but I told myself that it is a new year and that I'm going to leave the old one behind.<br /> Furthermore we slept really long and I had not much of an apetite so I ate little today. I also plan to go to the gym tomorrow. Have to look forward it doesn't help to cry afterwards.<br /> As I said before, today was ok. Had too little to eat but I really didn't feel like it after yesterday (3 apples, 2 joghurt, a bit of bread, some sweets that were left and a snackbar). Well I'm off to bed! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1523 Tue, 30 Dec 2008 11:17:14 +0000 specialk_sunnylee 1523@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>it sounds like you've been doing great these days. im so happy for you to hear that <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> lack of sleep is one of my biggest problems to during the scchol years. but im sure you'll get through just fine. thanks for your motivation and all the positives. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1522 Tue, 30 Dec 2008 10:06:42 +0000 Rainbow 1522@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Sadly I think you are right...I often noticed that he likes to say or do things that cause binges when I am a bit independent or tell him what I feel... then I binge and am a mess. I cry and I am hurt and he as the knight in shining armor is there to pick up the pieces. I don't think he does it intentionally, he probably likes it to see me weak because normally I'm a very feisty woman. I argue, I can be rude and I was the dominat one in our relationship for a long long time...<br /> Well I really made up my mind about that...I don't want to give him that possibility anymore, even if I binge again because of emotional distress I will try to stay standing and don't tell him. I want to be strong again.</p> <p>Ok. Yesterday I stayed strong. My mother and I ate some icecream in the late evening but it was more of a women-talk-and-eating-sweets-thing. So I feel ok about that.<br /> So far my day went ok. I exercised very much today as I went to the gym. I feel good about that and am proud that I could motivate myself. Normally my bf and me would go together but today I just went alone. Feels good (I know it sounds laughable)!<br /> Unfortunatey I didn't study today...so I'm going to try to do that in the evening.<br /> Still I don't want to stay up for to long as lack of sleep alway makes it harder to stay in control and I want to be fit tomorrow as it is going to be a stressful and long day <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_rolleyes.gif" title=":roll:" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1520 Mon, 29 Dec 2008 13:33:57 +0000 jacquirsw1 1520@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>(((((((((((((((hug)))))))))))))))</p> <p>You are right about not binging for someone else, it is definitely not worth it.</p> <p>It does sound like a bit of time apart would not hurt, maybe as you groe stronger you will see that he is not the person you need anyway, It might even be that he does this to kkep you down so that he feels powerful over you and you don't feel strong enough to leave the relationship. </p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1518 Mon, 29 Dec 2008 10:58:19 +0000 Rainbow 1518@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>And now I'm sad <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_sad.gif" title=":(" class="bb_smilies" /> <br /> I'm so sick of fighting *cry*<br /> It seems we just can't get along anymore...my parents tell me he does me no good....I think they are right...maybe at this point it is better to break up....I don't konw.<br /> Still I'm NOT going to binge, because of that!!!!!! I'm through with bingeing caused by him!!! It would not help, it would only make matters worse. I'm not going to feel disgusting and weak again so he can use it against me to keep me by his side. It's time to learn a bit about independence! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1511 Sun, 28 Dec 2008 16:46:12 +0000 Rainbow 1511@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p> <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif" title=":D" class="bb_smilies" /> Had a really good day.<br /> I ate healthy portions ate 5 times and I had some planned sweets too.<br /> I also talked to my boyfriend which was really good as we didn't have contact for 4 days and I was very depressed because of that. But I also had time to think and today I honestly told him what is mking me sad and he actually understood. I'm so relieved...i was so scared that we'd start into a new year fighting...<br /> So, I'm really happy now.<br /> Another point is that I realized that I actually learned something this past weeks. It's becoming easier to cope with a binge and I'm less set und getting the overeaten calories back.<br /> Still I've got some things to change:<br /> - I want to make my room a food-free-zone<br /> - I want to enjoy new year's eve but try not to overeat (too much, pizza is a MUST)<br /> - I want to snack less in the evenings and eat more in the mornings </p> <p>This are my small goals for the next week ( and of course to keep up with the things I have been changing till now).<br /> We'll see <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1500 Sun, 28 Dec 2008 12:01:08 +0000 jacquirsw1 1500@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I hope you have continued to have a good day!!</p> <p>You have done well to put the last few days behind you and just carry on, the cycle is definitely changing for you.</p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1493 Sun, 28 Dec 2008 04:55:47 +0000 Rainbow 1493@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Yesterday went ok <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif" title=":D" class="bb_smilies" /> <br /> All in all I had a good day. Ate a bit more than planned but that's ok. It was in no way overeating or binging. So I'm really proud that I made it and am back on track.<br /> At the moment my parents are out but I feel no urge to get something to eat. That's good! I didn't lose that achievement.<br /> Today I even exercised a bit. That's really good as I'm often lacking the motivation after a binge and exercising again usually means that I'm back to my routine again. I hope this will be a good day! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1488 Sat, 27 Dec 2008 11:25:53 +0000 cwaxman 1488@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>hey rainbow,<br /> i can relate to you exactly, three binging days also ive managed to put on about half a stone over christmas :S, i thought about restricing and so on, but then i thought no because this will eventually result in a binge.</p> <p>you've made me feel so much better to no your still thinking positive so so will I <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> also ive been ill with flu so i no how it feels!<br /> you can do it!<br /> x </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1487 Sat, 27 Dec 2008 11:12:22 +0000 Rainbow 1487@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Thanks again! Your words are a great motivatio <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif" title=":D" class="bb_smilies" /> <br /> Up till now (it is 5 pm in Germany) I had a fairly good day. No overeating and no binging to this point. I'm positive that it'll stay this way.<br /> We'll see... </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1485 Fri, 26 Dec 2008 17:46:33 +0000 jacquirsw1 1485@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>it is an achievement not to carry on binging so you should be proud of yourself for managing that much. remember little steps, still get you to where you want to be.</p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1484 Fri, 26 Dec 2008 16:14:56 +0000 Rainbow 1484@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Emotionally I had a another bad day... I spent most of it in bed and the urge to binge was very very strong. I have to admit that I overate a bit but thankfully I didn't binge. My hope is that it'll be easier tomorrow and that I will be able to eat normal again then.<br /> I made up my mind, that I will try to get up in the morning and stay away from bed till the evening. I will also try to keep myself occupied so that my mind can't wander. As I didn't binge today I hope the urge won't be as strong anymore.<br /> Think positive! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1483 Fri, 26 Dec 2008 06:16:08 +0000 jacquirsw1 1483@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>That is really good.</p> <p>It is amazing how quickly we can make propr changes, and this for you is one. You are right there is no point restricting it won't help and will just keep reminding you that you slipped.</p> <p>We are here to fight with you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1482 Fri, 26 Dec 2008 04:02:17 +0000 Rainbow 1482@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Thank you!<br /> I'm not feeling well at the moment. Still I decided to look forward. I thought about dieting and fasting and all that stuff for the whole night but in the end I think it is better to try to go on like nothing happened. I can't take back what I did and I don't want to restart a binging-cycle by extrem dieting, so I'm going to try keeping the routine I established during the past weeks.<br /> I know it will be hard the first few day but I'm going to fight.<br /> So today I got up, even though I felt depressed and wanted to lie in bed till next year (literally!!!) and ate my normal breakfast. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1480 Thu, 25 Dec 2008 14:56:29 +0000 jacquirsw1 1480@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Well first things first.</p> <p>THOSE GOOD DAYS DID HAPPEN nothing even the biggest binge in the world can change that!!</p> <p>I am sorry that you had such a bad time, no one has the right to treat people badly, that makes them worthless not you. I am not surprised that you have had a binge. this would have been a really difficult situation for anyone to deal with and given the short time you have been coping it is not something that emotionally any one would have managed, so don't think that you have let yourself down and that others in your situation would have done better, because the reality is they wouldn't.<br /> At least you have the support from your parents that is good and something you can look on as a big positive.</p> <p>My only real advice is for you to try to focus back on the days before this. Go back and re read your journal and the posts you have done for others and remember the things that you have felt. How positive you have been and how good it has been.</p> <p>You have been doing really well and this is only a short time. I bet that if you counted up all the days since you started posting on here there would be far more good days than bad days and that is all that counts.</p> <p>((((((((((hug)))))))))</p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1479 Thu, 25 Dec 2008 11:28:06 +0000 Rainbow 1479@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I had some really bad days since my last post. Yesterday my boyfriend and I had a huge fight. His dad treated me really bad and my boyfriend did nothing to stop it. I was so hurt and felt like I was worth absolutly nothing and I asked myself why I'm not good enough for them... I cried a lot and my parents were angry at his parents and it was so terrible... And that on chistmas.<br /> So... i binged...binged big time actually. I was so...I can't even describe it, I just knew I would hurt myself if I didn't do anything else to vent my frustration...<br /> And now...I don't know what to do anymore, I'm just hollow and empty and I'm striving for food to fill me.... I feel like I lost my mind.... like all those good days never happened, like I'm back at the beginning... </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1471 Tue, 23 Dec 2008 15:27:43 +0000 jacquirsw1 1471@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>and don't forget the bottom line is if you don't 'make it' ie be as good as you want to be 'so what' it won't be the end of the world.</p> <p>I am sure that you will make a good impression at your boyfriend's mothers. </p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1469 Tue, 23 Dec 2008 13:01:12 +0000 Rainbow 1469@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>It makes very much sense actually <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif" title=":D" class="bb_smilies" /> <br /> Today I'm feeling a bit nervous. I don't know why but I have this hunger for sweets. Hm... I'm glad that I learned how to control myself or this would have gone terribly wrong.<br /> I just hope this goes away till tomorrow and the day after because then I will be confronted with very much food and I can't really avoid that as it is Christmas <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_rolleyes.gif" title=":roll:" class="bb_smilies" /> <br /> Maybe the reason is all the pressure I put on myself...I'm really afraid that something could go wrong. Another point is that we'll have dessert at my boyfriend's mother's house and as I'm very shy I'm worried about making a good impression.<br /> Oh, I hate it when I'm so stressed out...that just makes my so vulnerable.<br /> I really have to try to stay optimistic and believe that I'm going to make it. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1465 Tue, 23 Dec 2008 11:50:42 +0000 jacquirsw1 1465@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hi Hon</p> <p>I am so glad that you are not reacting as badly to the weight change as you expected yourself to. You are right binging to see the scales go up is not the right thing to do, as it is not going to give you the actual extra's your body wants. It is about gradually increasing your intake so you don't scare yourself into starving or binging and find the balance point for you, then if you want to put a bit on you can.</p> <p>There is no need to thank us you are just as inspriring to us as we are to you. as again seeing someone else going through it and being open enough to journal how they are feeling takes alot of the feelings of lonliness and shame away as if other people are dealing with it then it is easier to cope if that makes sense.</p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1451 Mon, 22 Dec 2008 04:58:45 +0000 Rainbow 1451@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Decided that I will not let the weight get to me. Even though the loss worries me it's not the solution to binge just to see it go up again.<br /> Apropos binge, I'm alone at home at the moment.... <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_mrgreen.gif" title=":mrgreen:" class="bb_smilies" /> And I absolutely don't feel like a binge.<br /> I exercised a bit and then had my regular brekfast. It tasted good and I was satisfied...so now I'm just surfing the I-net or reading. I have absoutely no intention and no wish to go near the kitchen till my next meal and it feels GOOD! <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif" title=":D" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> <p>I also wanted to thank all the people who are reading this! You really really helped me getting better and I'm so happy that I found this forum. It's so motivating to know that you are not alone and that there are people out there who are struggling with the same but still support you. You're amazing! And you were a huge inspiration for me because with your journals you showed me that it's possible and gave me the courage to try it myself and to believe in myself again. Hugs to all of you!</p> <p>&lt;33 </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1449 Sun, 21 Dec 2008 16:17:55 +0000 Rainbow 1449@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Thanks <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif" title=":D" class="bb_smilies" /> <br /> Today I had another good day.<br /> Although I have to admit it didn't start out to well...Weighted myself this morning...115. I don't kow what I'm doing wrong. I'm eating sweets everyday. Ok, I exercise and I like eating healthy but still...<br /> That really worries me... </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1439 Sat, 20 Dec 2008 23:27:12 +0000 specialk_sunnylee 1439@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>again, that is absolutely amazing!<br /> you look good, you eat what you want but not binge<br /> and you feel GREAT!</p> <p>woohoo! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1438 Sat, 20 Dec 2008 19:13:04 +0000 Rainbow 1438@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Thank you! You two are so sweet!<br /> Today I had another good day <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif" title=":D" class="bb_smilies" /> <br /> In the evening there was this big party and I really felt ok about going. I liked how I looked in my dress and even ate a piece of cake.<br /> Normally I find it really hard to eat high-calorie stuff in front of people I don't know but this time it felt nice to eat with other people. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1426 Sat, 20 Dec 2008 12:28:27 +0000 specialk_sunnylee 1426@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>that is so cool!<br /> that's how i've been feeling in this month.<br /> then i get excited to tell people here about how well i did.<br /> THAT IS AWESOME!<br /> im so happy for you <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif" title=":D" class="bb_smilies" /> <br /> yay for everyone!</p> <p>Sunny &lt;&lt;33 </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1415 Fri, 19 Dec 2008 16:03:51 +0000 jacquirsw1 1415@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>OOOOOOOOOOOOOOH that was so good to read. I hope you are proud of yourself because I am. Have a hug ((((((((((((((((((( HUG ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))</p> <p>it was so motivating to see it being done.</p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1412 Fri, 19 Dec 2008 13:14:52 +0000 Rainbow 1412@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Today was a huge success!<br /> My mother went to work at 12 and normally I would binge till 6 pm. It was always this way when I was home alone. This time she left and I didn't grab sth. I just studied for a bit and then listened to some music. Later on I phoned my boyfriend and we had a huge fight <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_sad.gif" title=":(" class="bb_smilies" /> . Normally at least that would've caused a binge, but guess what? I didn't binge! I just made myself some lunch. Then I grabed a slice of chocolate, ok because it felt alright to eat a small dessert. I ate a bit but realized that I really wasn't feeling like chocolate right then, so I packed the last bit away for tonight!!! That's so cool!<br /> After that I listened to some happy music and later on went shopping with my dad. When we came home I had dinner and 5 minutes ago I had my piece of chocolate.<br /> Yay for today! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1405 Thu, 18 Dec 2008 14:50:24 +0000 Rainbow 1405@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I know, I'm trying to convince myself of that too. But that's also one of my problems: I'm always trying to be perfect <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_rolleyes.gif" title=":roll:" class="bb_smilies" /> Got to accept that I'll never be and that its okay this way. Nobody is. We all have weaknesses.</p> <p>Today I had a fairly good day. Bought myself a Twix, that wasn't planned but I'm ok with that. It's nothing to worry about in my opinion.<br /> I'm a bit nervous because of alle the Christmas-eating coming up but I will try not to think so much about it and eat healthy portions.<br /> Today I also came home because I'm going to spend the holidays with my family. I'm really happy about that. Makes it less easier to binge as I don't want them to take notice of my problem. I want to make them proud <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":-)" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1402 Wed, 17 Dec 2008 18:27:59 +0000 jacquirsw1 1402@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>it's hard because you can't expect to suddenly be perfect. and that is ok</p> <p>Jacqui </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1397 Wed, 17 Dec 2008 13:23:47 +0000 Rainbow 1397@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Today was...okay<br /> Had a very hard time staying on track because I always need some days to regain control.<br /> So I did eat some things, that weren't planned but didn't really binge.<br /> Well I'm happy that I achieved that much... I will try to do even better tomorrow.<br /> Hope that works out because after the second good day after a binge I usually feel in control again...<br /> Still I'm wondering why it is so hard when I had no problems for 17 days... </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/rainbows-journal#post-1393 Tue, 16 Dec 2008 17:23:35 +0000 specialk_sunnylee 1393@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>really, eating 2200calories isnt THAT much.<br /> and yea, you binged and whats gonna happen the next?<br /> nothing! you CAN get back to your daily routine.</p> <p>cheer up! </p> <p>Sunny&lt;33 </p>