http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ Support to stop binge eating, stop emotional eating, and stop overeating. en Thu, 09 Sep 2010 20:42:16 +0000 http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/sarabelles-journal#post-86739 Mon, 30 Aug 2010 12:29:58 +0000 Claire 86739@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>hey i can totaly relate to your story, i am also 5foot small and my bingeing was also caused by rapid weight loss.<br /> Do you find it hard as a small person to know what is a normal size for you? i know i do, i haveing noithing to comparemyself to and i always think because im shorter i should be smaller than everone elce but the problem is by how much?<br /> You will be able tp stop, we all feel like it will never end but we just have to believe it will.</p> <p>x </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/sarabelles-journal#post-84418 Thu, 19 Aug 2010 09:09:52 +0000 Lost 84418@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hi Sara, welcome to the forum!!</p> <p>I too used to be anorexic - I had chronic anorexia for years and numerous hospital admissions because of it. I have now struggled with binge eating for about 18 months. Well done for fighting your way out from the grip of anorexia! I know how difficult that is. I have a few things I could say that might help you (these are only opinions really, largely based on my own experiences).</p> <p>Firstly, I would say that it is because of your anorexia (which included the restriction of food/attempts to lose weight) that you have begun binge eating...as is the same for pretty much everyone here on this forum. in general in our society, dieting (in all its verious forms) is very acceptable and even promoted - its totally normal to diet! Personally (after learning the hard way!) i think dieting, and this strong desire we have to be a certain shape and weight - is a horrible experience, which leaves us feeling unworthy, deprived, and miserable. and for so many people it leads to binging. Which is also unpleasant (to put it mildly). and your late night binging is probably (almost definetly) a result of not eating enough in the day. when you 'ban' certain foods, your mind craves them. and when you dont eat enough calories, your body craves them - its a self protective mechanism - your body wants you to put as much food into as possible at once, because it thinks it will have to starve again the next day.</p> <p>I totally understand how that feels to think you will be happier if you lost 10 pounds(i want to loose about a stone!!) - but have a think about what those attempts at losing 10 pounds will bring you - another diet, and dieting will only keep you in the binge-diet cycle. If you keep dieting, you will keep binging. Trying to develop a healthy relationship with food where no food is restricted is an important approach to attempt to beat binge eating problems. And no, eating normally wont make you gain a load of weight (which is what we all fear!) - in fact developing a normal relationship with food will last a lifetime (you can keep it up forever, you cant keep up a diet forever!) and your body will sit at a nice natural weight for a life time (which i personally think is what looks best!!) </p> <p>I really would encourage you to think about trying to put calorie counting, dieting etc in the past...you have already struggled for a year or so, dont let your eating disorder steal anymore of your time, YOU ARE WORTH SO MUCH MORE!! you have the potential to develop a good relationship with food, go to college, and create loads of happy memories and good friendships! and that is so much more preferable then a life spent being a slave to a diet, or to calorie counting, or to the bad feelings that come after a binge.</p> <p>and if you did manage to lose 10 pounds - you may end up not wanting to stop there. when I first became anorexic i wanted to lose 15 pounds...I ended up losing about 75 pounds. all im saying is, as well as leading to binging, diets can also trigger an anorexia relapse. And as you already know, thats no fun!!</p> <p>I really hope this post didnt sound like a 'i know it all lecture', coz it wasnt meant to at all!!! Just wanted to tell you my thoughts/experiences. </p> <p>why not have a look at other people journals on here - it can be great for inspiration and ideas!! everyone here is very lovely and very supportive!</p> <p>Keep posting!! <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":-)" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> <p>Loz xx </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/sarabelles-journal#post-84345 Thu, 19 Aug 2010 00:47:44 +0000 Sarabelle 84345@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hey I'm Sara. I'm 18 and starting college on Monday!<br /> Last summer I became anorexic and lost 25 lbs so I was 5'0 and 80 lbs. Because of this along with a lot of other emotional stuff going on in my life ie; my grandmother's and friend's death, pressure of applying for college along with a lot of other small things, I became very depressed and considered commiting suicide. Although I was often annoyed and upset with my family, which is normally very unlike me, the only thing that stopped me from ending my life was the memory of how close my sisters and I use to be before I became anorexic. In january I started seeing a counsulor, which helped some. I started eating more, from 500 to 700 to 1000, 1200 then 1300 calories per day, mostly vegtables, fruits and only low-calories, low-fat foods. around april I admitted i was anorexic and she urged me to tell my mom and get a nutritional therist. It took a few weeks, but I finally admitted my problem and starting seeing a therpist in late may. through thias hard year, I lost a large number of friends, who werent there for me when I needed them and although talked about my condition behind my back, never did so to my face where it really couldve helped my recover faster, knowing I was more cared for. Although I do miss thier company, I dont take for granted the friends that stuck by me in that hard time and love them even more for it.<br /> after I started seeingmy theripist in may, she taught me what i needed to eat to become more healthy and requested i starting eating 1500 calries a day. I never really picked up the knack of how to eat normally. either I would try to eat noramlly and it would be really hard, or I would just forget about it and eat veggies or I would eat hardly anything and bigne late at night. Sooner or later I only yoyo dieted; ate hardly anything but vegtables all day, bigne at night, then the next day hardly eat all day. next day eat veggies and bign at night. and it became and still is this vicious cycle I cant get out of.<br /> I dont count calories anymore, which has released some stress, I'm worries because although ive gained the much needed weight back, ( im now 110lbs at 5'0) i feel too fat and still want to tone and lose weight. I am hping by the time college starts on monday, i can learn or at least be forced to stop binging became I only binge in privacy and how often are you alone at night at college with an endless supply of food a few feet away? besides that, I really want to tone up and lose about 10 lbs again. I've tried for the last few months to stop binging and I know its not a lot to the years some people have spent but when you think about it, ive spend more than a year having eating habits and its just really taken a toll on my life and stress and relationships. I am scared I wont be able to stop in college! I knw I have the intense want to stop binging but i dont know if I have the strngth! </p> <p>anyways, this was nice writing all down even if no one read it. I'm already starting to feel more in control.<br /> love always, sara </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie/page/2#post-80503 Mon, 26 Jul 2010 05:53:25 +0000 Ecu 80503@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>hi ellarb, i had that feeling too. that happens when we are too focus on putting pressure on the short-term. we want to get to our goals that are too difficult. so think about small, doable goals. that is going to make you see that you can change your life doing baby steps. you can do it, girl! hugs </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie/page/2#post-80387 Sun, 25 Jul 2010 12:36:21 +0000 Lauren 80387@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Oh honey I am so sorry.....big, big, big hugs coming your way. Don't give up on yourself. ~L </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie/page/2#post-80357 Sun, 25 Jul 2010 08:09:54 +0000 Ellarb 80357@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I HATE THIS. I just dont even want to eat food anymore. I am feeling so hopelessy stuck in this cycle. I dont even care as much as I used to about getting better. I feel so screwed </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie/page/2#post-78881 Thu, 15 Jul 2010 13:28:45 +0000 Jenn 78881@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hey Ellarb! hang in there you can do this;) hope that tactic works!:)</p> <p>~Jenn~ </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie/page/2#post-78675 Tue, 13 Jul 2010 19:36:31 +0000 Lauren 78675@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Good luck..YOU CAN DO THIS!! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie/page/2#post-78520 Mon, 12 Jul 2010 21:42:20 +0000 purplestorm77 78520@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>hi el, hope that things are going well for you. i think college dorm rooms can be very difficult. they were for me anyway. i find it very comforting to read other people's posts. and to try to "go with the flow" as much as i can, because i'm still trying to figure out what works for me too. we're all in this together!!!! hang in there!!! best wishes.<br /> g. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie/page/2#post-78472 Mon, 12 Jul 2010 13:58:02 +0000 jboo 78472@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hi El - thanks for sharing your tips from the therapist, let us know how they work for you!! I think the warm foods is interesting, haven't heard that before, but it makes sense - it gives you that "pause" before eating. I'd love to go through more of your journal when I have more time, best wishes for now!! <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie/page/2#post-78451 Mon, 12 Jul 2010 12:03:20 +0000 dancer00 78451@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I never thought about that tactic...warm foods. The only reason I can't totally adhere to that is b/c I try to eat a lot of raw greens, but maybe outside of that food I could try the same thing. I am a SUCKER for cereal, smoothies, bread, icecream etc. If I go down that road its OVER lol. I'm really going to think about that.</p> <p>I just came off a looooong stretch of bingeing...so long I'm not even going to think about it, and am going on my 3rd day binge free. If you look at my journal you'll see how I've come to some successful strategies. I'll be thinking about you. Well, to spare you reading mine...1. No eating after 7pm PERIOD (unless I'm off my normal schedule and have to eat dinner later) 2. No dessert after dinner (this almost ALWAYS turns into a binge) 3. Three meals a day no matter what. I have a serious problem "allowing" myself to eat, especially during the day and it sets me up for my nighttime bingeing. 4. BE PROACTIVE...I almost always binge at night when I'm anxious or lonely or bored so I make phone calls, clean up a bit, watch tv in my bedroom (away from the living room).</p> <p>You know, that brings me to something I forgot about...a therapist once told me to "move around" (physically). Like I almost always binge after sitting around the living room on this one particular sofa...so if I wanna watch tv in there I need to sit on another sofa or chair. Or watch tv in another room. I never binge in my bedroom, never in the basement while I'm on the computer. You might be able to try that? Physically LEAVE YOUR DORM if you have to. Roam around and see what other people are doing you know? Journal sitting outside your dorm room door, watch tv in the common room or w/e you have that has sofas or something. You have that added challenge of being isolated. That is REALLY bad news for me.</p> <p>Hang in there!!! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-78435 Mon, 12 Jul 2010 08:39:45 +0000 Ecu 78435@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hi Ellarb, well that is a great begining. I hope tomorrow is a better day and your new tecniques work! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-78362 Sun, 11 Jul 2010 21:32:54 +0000 Ellarb 78362@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Thanks guys. The time at home was good and I didnt binge and once again was feeling good, but I just finished yet another binge-ew yuck, Ill spare you all the details about how gross and fat i feel. Starting tomorrow things are going to change. I talked to a therapist and he gave me some ideas to try. I am only going to eat warm meals so I have to go into the kitchen and prepare them.(This also eliminates trigger foods-cereal, granola bars) I am going to eat all my meals SLOWLY (aka NO SCARFING). And I am eating all meals out of my room and in the lobby. I really hope this works! I need some strategy to work if I am ever going to beat this. HERE IT GOES! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-78172 Sat, 10 Jul 2010 21:02:14 +0000 Grace 78172@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Yo Ellarb,</p> <p>I know EXACTLY how you feel. I wasn't anoerexic, but I was deadly close cos I used to diet so strictly. Now, I've been bingeing quite regularly. D: Don't feel bad, cos you will get there one day!</p> <p>Have faith ! <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> <p>Grace<br /> xx </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-78167 Sat, 10 Jul 2010 19:54:27 +0000 Jenn 78167@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Dancer--I know that's exactly what i meant i mean who's the boss of us food or ourselves? i mean we NEED to get over that..but it wont happen overnight it's a slow process..but i'm sure we'll do it</p> <p>Ecu--So did i when my mom wasn't around..God that's really uncomfortable..i mean in your own house...i know the feeling..and it sucks..but your also right about the change i have been able to do it so everything is possible;)</p> <p>Hey Ellarb..what's up? </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-78104 Sat, 10 Jul 2010 15:33:26 +0000 Ecu 78104@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hi Ellarb, </p> <p>I´m so sorry to hear that you´re struggling. It took me 15 years to know why i binged. so it´s not an easy thing to do. we are not designed to think about everything all the time, that is why we have issues and we sometimes dont know exactly the root of the problem. For me it was loneliness and boredom, i used to be alone for hours after school and ate to avoid those feelings. At some point, I was a food thief when my mom was having a nap and i tried to get the food without waking her up. what an image is that! so this can be changed. if you dont know now the root, dont worry about it, that will come. now let´s focus on the reason of the daily issue facing food. Do you still restrict your food intake? Do you think it is noon a lack of food, but due to stress? </p> <p>Hope you are doing fine! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77997 Fri, 09 Jul 2010 15:25:20 +0000 dancer00 77997@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Jenn...if you read this, (and Ellarb), those voices are so WRONG, but we've conditioned ourselves to repeat the negative tape recorder in our brains every time we eat. But we ALL keep telling ourselves the same bad things. Believe me, that negative tape playing over and over again is why I'm relapsing and having the worst time getting out of it. I feel like I don't deserve food b/c I ate too much last night. I had a bowl of strawberries a few mins ago and was panicking b/c I didn't know if it would fit into my "calorie count." I had to force myself to breathe and say "you are allowed to eat, food is nourishment and nutrition for your body." And I felt better, mentally and physically that I had some food in my system, it was what I wanted and I ate it and was ok with it. If I can make it through tonite without going overboard or bingeing it will FINALLY break my relapse. One minute, one hour one day at a time.</p> <p>I also used to say "oh no, I'm not hungry" when I was literally starving all the time. That behavior is what eventually led me into BED. Your body and mind will eventually force you to eat and eat everything in site bc your body and brain are literally starved for nutrients and you go into survival mode...pack the pounds on b/c you may not eat again for a loooooooong time. Then we can't break the cycle. We'll overcome. I have to believe that. And you do too. We'll be fine one day...and it may take a long time, but we will one day have a "normal" or close to "normal" relationship with food. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77986 Fri, 09 Jul 2010 14:46:27 +0000 Jenn 77986@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hey Ellarb just catching up here! i'm so sorry you feel that way but i don't know if you've notice but Yes you have been bingeing but i realized that the binges weren't as strong as i guess they used to be..i mean even though you binged 3 days in a row, they've changed you said it your self once you were able to stop, and the you binged less than what you normally do..so every bad thing has a positive one so when you're feeling down look the bright side of the problem i mean those 3 binges have helped you progress in the road to recovery! </p> <p>And about the calorie counting God! i don't know how to tell you how much i relate with that!! ugh! i know that feeling you get when you find yourself in front of food and without even starting to eat your just doing the math..or when someone asks you to go out you're already are thinking what you're going to eat so you're able to count the calories..but you know what if you set your mind to it you WILL get pass the whole counting thing!..take it form someone who used to say yes mom i ate..when was starving..someone who actually cried in a restaurant 'cause the breast meat and the broccoli had to much olive oil (which they really didn't)..I'll tell you the truth it wont be easy but it is possible to do Honestly!..reading about you struggling with that makes me remember how i was and it feels like ages..like did i actually do that?? you know and if i was able to do it then you can definitely do it!</p> <p>Just one day at the time..when you find yourself thinking about calories and the amount you've eaten and literally going crazy.. TAKE A DEEP BREATH, and tell yourself to STOP..and i know as hard as it is (if you were going to eat when this happens) eat what you REALLY WANT TO..not what's best..not what you SHOULD have, not what has less CALORIES..but what YOU WANT!..after you eat it i KNOW for sure you will feel like you ate the entire world even if you didn't but when that happens to you repeat the same process above DEEP BREATH..CALM DOWN, AND STOP YOURSELF...stay away from food for a while do somethings you need to, or take a walk, some fresh air will do good and then go back to your room or around food if you have to and face what ever comes..I know you might be thinking"Right..haven't you heard it's easier said than done..why don't you do it?""..but let me remind you that i have done it and i got over that even if i'm stuck here with BED..but like i said one day at the time..That little voice in your head that says all bad stuff about yourself and goes like ""You ate! you know how fat you look? honestly!! you pig""" wont really go away..but once you learn to master it..it wont get the best of you..i know i shouldn't be saying some of the things i've said but that's the truth and i don't want to lie to you...but just remember honey i got over that..yes i have BED..but this is a hundred time better than being anorexic i know what it's like to deal with it! i'm not saying BED is "COOL" but it's a little tiny bit easier to get through!..if you need anything really don't hold yourself and just ask!...totally fine with pm!</p> <p>You may think you're the only one who's facing two things at the time but believe me your not we're all here to help you!<br /> Hope you app goes well!</p> <p>Take Care, Stay Motivated!;)<br /> ~Jenn~ </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77960 Fri, 09 Jul 2010 13:29:24 +0000 dancer00 77960@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I'm sorry Ellarb. I've been struggling terribly with a stretch of bingeing. I really overdid it last night but it def wasn't a full on binge and for that I'm thankful. I'm hoping baby steps will wean me off the bingeing and I know I didn't eat properly throughout the day. It's getting really hard b/c my summer schedule is so busy at times. That's great you're seeing a therapist. If anything it will do you a TON of good to just get all the garbage out. I see a therapist and it's funny...I don't feel like I'm hungry or thinking about food after getting everything off my chest. I think anxiety is the root of my eating, well stress coupled with the anxiety. Let us know how it goes. Hang in there. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77934 Fri, 09 Jul 2010 12:24:52 +0000 Lauren 77934@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hey Ellar...sorry you had a tough night last night <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_sad.gif" title=":(" class="bb_smilies" /> Do you think you ate enough throughout the day? Sometimes those night binges are caused from not getting in enough during the day time....but it sounds like you know yours are emotionally driven. Maybe next time you have the bingey feelings, write down what thoughts &amp; feeling are going on inside to try and figure out what is triggering it? Great that you have a therapy session scheduled...they should definitely be able to help you get to the bottom on it! Hope u have a good day today! ~Lauren </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77891 Fri, 09 Jul 2010 06:55:06 +0000 Buy Dog Treats 77891@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hello nice to meet all of you I am Elizabeth from Asia. I am a Web Operator and my general hobby to discuss on forum. I think forum is the place where can I exchange of knowledge with others </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77775 Thu, 08 Jul 2010 15:12:44 +0000 Ellarb 77775@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I binged again last night....not as big though. I am trying to stay positive, but it is hard when I have binged 3 nights in a row. I always feel so ready and motivated the whole day and then its just those few minutes late at night that can take me over <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_sad.gif" title=":(" class="bb_smilies" /> I finally was able to set up an appt with a psychiatrist this weekend, so I have high hopes for that. I know that I eat to mask and push away other thoughts and emotions, but even if I stop and think I still dont know what im trying to push away...any advice on that? </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/moral-support-just-someone-to-understand#post-77626 Wed, 07 Jul 2010 20:02:18 +0000 AnimalLuvr09 77626@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I would love to be a "third buddy" in your team <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> I am in the exact same situation as you and Ellarb. I am 19 and 5'6" and I am home from college getting worse and worse with my eating habits. I feel so out of control here and it is such a trigger place for me. I don't know how to stop. I go to sleep at night planning on how the following day will go: what I will have to eat, when I will eat, what I will get accomplished, what I will do for exercise... everything. Then I wake up the next morning with good intentions, make one slip-up (usually eating something different for breakfast) and then I just eat continuously for the rest of the day thinking "well, I've already failed today. What's the point in trying now?" I know that I should stop eating and go do something else, but I feel like I just can't do anything but eat. Once I am to the point of almost going cross-eyed from being so full, I go up to my room and cry, maybe hurt myself, and go to sleep. I'm not even sure how to eat "normally". I have not been able to have a healthy relationship with food since before I can remember. I know it will be very difficult, but maybe everyone on here can offer each other support (I certainly will to you) and we can make baby steps to taking better care of ourselves! Good luck girl! Hang in there <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif" title=":D" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77618 Wed, 07 Jul 2010 18:56:29 +0000 dancer00 77618@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I'm with Lauren. I used to know the calories in every food under the sun. Now I know a range, and I don't really think about the tally, but I do look at the portion after I fix something and think to myself "is that too much? too little" You know, you kinda know what portion you should probably be eating. I catch myself counting and then I stop myself, look at the portion and think "that's reasonable" and I'm usually right b/c I'll be full when i'm done. The problem is STOPPING after you're full. Why are we all so in love with food???!!! I've been going to the site that I came across on someone else's journal called ohsheglows.com. I really like reading about her issues with food and how she overcame them with intuitive eating.</p> <p>Well, anyhow...hang in there. We're all here for you, and eachother </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77514 Wed, 07 Jul 2010 08:23:43 +0000 Lauren 77514@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hey girl...I really can relate because I constantly calorie counted for at least 5 years so like you, I knew the calories in every thing. It took me a while to wean off of it but what helped was I kind of new a range of calories I was eating for each meal like 400-500 and new my snacks were ok too, but I tried to force myself not to tally the total calories if that makes sense? So it kind of became something I was able to think about less and less. And the way to get out of the addiction part of it is to just listen to your body and get out of the dieting mode...the dieting mode keeps our mind obsessing about food 24/7...so working your way to intuitive eating will be great for you! Hope you are able to get back on track today. Hugs, Lauren </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77500 Wed, 07 Jul 2010 06:59:08 +0000 Ellarb 77500@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>I know exactly how you feel (dancer). I wish I could live without food. This is like an addiction I have to break but I cant live withou food. It makes it so much harder. I know that calorie counting is bad and YES I always do that where I eat more becauseI have room in my calorie count and it turns into a binge, but I dont know how NOT to count calories. I have been doing it for 2 years now and I know the amount of calories in all the foods I eat, so it seems unavoidable.<br /> I binged last night...that 2 days in a row. I am gaining weight and i feel very fat and I dont like my body right now. I really wish this would just end already.<br /> Today I am going to try to eat withot constantly thinking about calories. I am going to try and listen to my body more, because I have pretty much been ignoring it for 2 yrs! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77414 Tue, 06 Jul 2010 16:20:35 +0000 dancer00 77414@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Calorie counting for me was the beginning of the end for me! I went into fullblown BED by restricting and calorie counting. I would do the "I still have room in my calorie count so I can eat something else" way of thinking, regardless if I was hungry and that extra allowance would catapult me into a binge. Mmmm...this is so good...I'lljust have a little more...and a little more would turn into a binge. My first problem is that my calorie counting wasn't enough calories in the first place, so I would actually be hungry and feel so deprived that I would eat no matter what my count was in the end. It's impossible to live up to the caloric # we come up with b/c most of us are waaaaaaayyyyyy too restrictive to begin with and our body and mind is going to tell us to eat if we're hungry and then we view it as total failure if we go over even by 100 calories. </p> <p>Hang in there...I binged late last night. Of course yet again I was being restrictive and finally just threw the towel in. I'm in the "i hate food" mentality right now. I wish I didn't have to eat! lol </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77385 Tue, 06 Jul 2010 15:45:12 +0000 Lauren 77385@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hey girl...sorry you are struggling <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_sad.gif" title=":(" class="bb_smilies" /> Hmm maybe it would be best for you to stop calorie counting? I found that adding in extra because I had more calories, but yet wasn't actually hungry, ended up making me feel guilty (because of course the lower the calories in the end, the better) and then I got into that all or nothing well I already ate extra, so screw today. Its easier to get into a place where you just listen to your body and not an arbitrary calorie limit....so maybe try that? Hang in there...I'm sure your mom is going to be understanding...she doesn't expect BED to just go away magically....it takes time... ~L </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77311 Tue, 06 Jul 2010 07:34:52 +0000 Ecu 77311@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>you know when i see what i ate during the day in my personal journal, i ask myself ok i have eaten this and this and this, am i hungry now? what kind of food am i hungry for? in absolutely NO CASE your mom has to be a non-supportive support! disapointment and negativity just leads to more hopeless binging. this is a process and if someone has to be your support, has to be able to understand that it is going to take months or even years. quick changes, dont last long. and we want our eating habits to become good and long-lasting! just a note: if your mom does not understand, you have a whole forum supporters! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77310 Tue, 06 Jul 2010 07:20:05 +0000 Ellarb 77310@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Thanks you guys. waking up and reading this gives me a little hope knowing i have support. Ecu you have the right attitude: I need to learn from the binges in order to stop them in the future. My sister and I ate dinner together while she was here, so I wasnt very hungry. We had just gone to the grocery store to buy food for me (I am living on my own in a dorm). All the food looked/sounded really good and I still had room in my calorie count for the day. I started with some yogurt and it was delicious. Then I moved onto the cereal and this was even better, so I had another bowl and enjoyed it too. I was refilling my bowls so quickly that I wouldnt even have time to rest and see if I was full (which deep down I knew I was, but i just wanted more). Eventually I was no longer enjoying the food (I had other stuff besides cereal), I was just eating out of guilt, because I had already screwed up again so whatever. I felt ashamed of myself, but the thing that bothers me the most is that I will have to tell my mom and I know she will be so disappointed in me. I almost dont want to tell her the truth. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77274 Tue, 06 Jul 2010 04:59:29 +0000 Ecu 77274@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>hi ellarb, dont be too hard on yourself. this is a process and you need to go forward. the binges will make you learn from your past mistakes. so what have you learned from last time? what happened exactly? have you eaten enough before that binge? did you feel stress or some other feeling right before? how did you eat? what did you eat? how did you feel? there is a lot of information behind the simple use of food for comfort, so let´s analyse it! we are with you, honey!!!! we love you </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77218 Mon, 05 Jul 2010 19:06:32 +0000 dancer00 77218@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>You know what, it's really OK. You stopped yourself before it went off the deepend which is quite an accomplishment. Do NOT sit with your crappy feelings. It only perpetuates the binge cycle. That's what I did on day 1 of my bingefest 3 days ago and I just kept right on going. I'm here for you. You can do it. Take a deep breath, count to ten, take a bath if you can (or hot shower) and you'll feel better. Let the water wash away all your guilt and bad feelings about succumbing to BED. </p> <p>You will not live your life like this. Right now I'm in the same boat as you...very early in my recovery. I just admitted I had a problem two weeks ago. Sheesh...let's be realistic and give ourselves a little bit of a break. I know how badly you're feeling b/c I went on my food bender after 11 days clean. I wanted to die for being so weak and eating so much. I mean, I REALLY went off the deep end. Probably gained 5 lbs in 3 days. </p> <p>YOU CAN DEFEAT BED. It will happen. Give yourself time. Hang in there. You're going to be fine. One second, one minute, one hour, one day at a time. Try to distract by unpacking/organizing, connecting with old friends or something. Don't sit alone and dwell. That's the kiss of death for me.</p> <p>You can do it! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77217 Mon, 05 Jul 2010 18:59:02 +0000 Ellarb 77217@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>God. I knew this was coming. Literally 30 minutes after my sister dropped me off back at my dorm I was bingeing. I stopped before I normally do, which is good i guess, but I still ate way more calories than i need in a day. I am so so so disappointed in myself. I cant even go for 3 days without bingeing. I need a new strategy or something to stop me, because nothing is working for me. I cant live my life like this, because right now I hate my life. My mom is going to call tonight to see how i am doing and I am going to have to tell her how once again I have binged. I know she will be so disappointed in me and it is crushing me. I am so frustrated with all of this right now. I cant take it. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77215 Mon, 05 Jul 2010 18:46:06 +0000 dancer00 77215@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>You can do it Ellarb! You really can...prepare yourself mentally for those feelings of bingeyness b/c they will come. I knew that would come when I came back from vacation but I couldn't get control of them. I was too emotionally overwhelmed. I just finally broke my binge cycle today. If you fall, you can get back up. We all do it, after every setback. Good luck! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77189 Mon, 05 Jul 2010 13:49:37 +0000 Lauren 77189@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hey girl congrats on 2 days!! Hope today is going well too! no worries about when you go back to school...we'll all still be here and will help you stay in a binge-free place when you go back to school! ~L </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77106 Mon, 05 Jul 2010 03:43:06 +0000 Ecu 77106@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>hey 2 days binge free is a great improvement! wish you have a nice stay with your family and enjoy the time with them. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77072 Sun, 04 Jul 2010 20:05:33 +0000 Ellarb 77072@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Thanks for the support everyone! Tonight will officially make it 2 days binge free I have not done that in a long time. I am really happy with how I am doing, but I am still nervous about going back to school and being alone ( I am home with my family for the holiday). I am going to try my best to prep myself, because I know the urge to binge will come. Wish me luck! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-77053 Sun, 04 Jul 2010 19:13:21 +0000 Lauren 77053@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hey girl..glad you had a good day yesterday!! You are right just take this one day at a time! hope the rest of your weekend has gone well! Hugs, Lauren </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-76837 Sat, 03 Jul 2010 03:24:53 +0000 Ecu 76837@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hi! sounds a simple and right start. baby steps will take you to recovery! just do one step at a time, everyday there is smth to be happy for. success can be found in those little battles when having your lunch or snack. you´ll see. you a do it </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-76791 Fri, 02 Jul 2010 18:22:10 +0000 dancer00 76791@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Good for you Ellarb! I just caught up on your journal after my vacay. Just got back this morning. It is truly one day at a time. I went 11 days without a binge and relapsed while on vacation. And I've been on a total foodbender all day today. I feel like sh--, like I can't even walk. I doubt I'll even be able to go to cycling in the am. I'm so disgusted with myself, but tomorrow really is a new day. I've gotta start over again, which sucks, but I totally stopped doing everything that worked for me while I was on vacation. And wasn't posting either, which was probably the kicker. Hang in there. We've all got to lean on eachother. I feel like I'm crazy right now. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-76787 Fri, 02 Jul 2010 17:22:34 +0000 Ellarb 76787@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Today was a good day! I only ate when I was hungry and I enjoyed the food more. I was also able to exercise, so I am feeling good. Tonight I go home, so I think the fact that I am with my family will prevent any binges. I am going to prepare in case the urge to binge comes so I will be ready to beat it. 1 day at a time! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/help-19#post-76736 Fri, 02 Jul 2010 13:20:36 +0000 Carmilla 76736@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hello Beth</p> <p>I haven't yet had the confidence to talk to friends about my bingeing problems, but I have finally got round to telling my son and daughters (my husband aleady knew) and am glad that I have, as they were all very understanding.</p> <p>It must be difficult changing shifts from day work to nights, and I imagine that as a doctor you probably work very hard, so no wonder you're so tired! I find it more difficult to resist bingeing if I'm tired. How long do you have to work nights for? Do you find your eating settles down a bit once you adapt to the different hours?</p> <p>Anyway I hope the rest of your day is good, Beth - keep those posts coming!</p> <p>Best wishes</p> <p>Carmilla xx </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/help-19#post-76732 Fri, 02 Jul 2010 12:41:47 +0000 Beth 76732@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>hi, i haven't been on for a few days cos i've been working quite a lot - i work at a hospital too lauren, i'm a doctor, what do you do? i've had a bit of a rubbish day today, am starting nights tonight which i hate so have been in the house alone trying to sleep but just binging non-stop and now feel sick as well as tired because i haven't slept.</p> <p>i saw a friend i haven't seen in a couple of weeks last night - she said i looked great now i've put on weight and meant it as a compliment but made me feel a bit shit. i didn't talk to her about the binging, but maybe i should have - have you guys told friends, and is it helpful for you?</p> <p>xxxxxxxxxxxxxx </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-76663 Thu, 01 Jul 2010 18:42:58 +0000 sonias 76663@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hey Ellarb<br /> I can relate to your situation. After I binge .. all I can think about is going to the gym to make myself feel better. Don't worry.. take this one step at a time. Don't be too hard on yourself.. start tomorrow fresh. Try tea and diet soda... really helps me. I think you have to figure out when you're actually hungry. Try doing something that distracts you when you feel like bingeing. Like listening to music or watching tv. Also try drinking lots of water.<br /> All the best and don't be too hard on yourself. The healing process is going to be slow but just remember the feeling you get when you have had a binge free day.<br /> Sonia </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-76657 Thu, 01 Jul 2010 18:11:44 +0000 Ellarb 76657@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Wow. I cant believe the different phases I go through. I binged once again...a big one. I felt so gross afterwards. Youd think I could remember that feeling and stop myself when I start to binge, but for some reason I continue to do this. So much for my binge free streak. </p> <p>It was such a big binge that I could not stand without feeling like I was going to throw up. So once again, I cant exercise today. That makes me feel even more fat and disgusting. I just want to go to the gym for hours because that would make me feel at least a little better. But that would only be a short term fix.</p> <p>I really dont know what to do anymore. I have tried so many different methods and things to avoid and stop the binge, but nothing has worked so far. I just want the day to end now. I dont like this feeling of self hatred and disappointment. </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-76626 Thu, 01 Jul 2010 14:29:45 +0000 Ecu 76626@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>day one is a nice thing!!! well done! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-76593 Thu, 01 Jul 2010 08:58:36 +0000 craigeyboy57 76593@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Baby steps my friend.... don't allow yourself to get too high..or too low. Nice and steady...you WILL beat this my friend! <img src="http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_cool.gif" title="8)" class="bb_smilies" /> </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-76590 Thu, 01 Jul 2010 08:03:48 +0000 Ellarb 76590@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>This website is a really amazing place. I have never gotten so much support for this! It is great. Thanks to everyone for responding. I didnt exercise yesterday, which is hard for me to do, especially the day after a binge. I am trying to ease off of exercising so much, because most of the time I only do it to burn off calories from food that I eat. 1 day binge free! Hopefully this keeps going! </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-76453 Wed, 30 Jun 2010 15:37:46 +0000 Lauren 76453@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Oh honey I am so sorry...I hope you don't give up on yourself. Please remember that you have tons of support here and people willing to talk you through those post-binge horrific moment. You will get through this and be ok. Hang in there sweetie. ~Lauren </p> http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/topic/hey-everyone-im-a-newbie#post-76452 Wed, 30 Jun 2010 15:36:35 +0000 Dreamer 76452@http://howtostopeating.com/binge-eating-forum/ <p>Hey!</p> <p>Take it from someone who has always pushed herself extremely hard- it's okay ease up on yourself. I am finally starting to learn that and, for once in a lot of years, actually feel like I am improving! You will too! Don't give up on yourself when you have a bad day- we have all had bad days- tons of them, but we are all here, talking to each other and giving support. It really does help. And one bad day doesn't mean you will continue to do that. Learn from it. The next day, try to tell yourself it's okay, let it go, and then move on. Start by not worrying about what you eat- binging or dieting- just eat when you want and what you want, and tell yourself you can do that every day from now on! I know it's terrifying, but it really does work. Once you finally convince yourself that the food will forever be available to you, you won't feel like you have to get rid of it all now and start over with nothing bad the next day!</p> <p>Keep trying and posting. Everyone here is so helpful! You will get through it... </p>